Nick Peron

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Avengers Classic #12

Credits

This Hostage Earth

This story is reprinted from Avengers #12

Into the Great Wide Open

When the Avengers fought off a group of the Mole Man’s Moloid followers, many of them spill out into the city.[1] A group of four named Umbu, Yonkashi, Dennis, and Ootie are incredibly frightened by their new surroundings. While trespassing in a junkyard, they are shot at and is hit. They carry him to a trainyard where he soon dies from his wounds.

After burying their friend, they begin exploring. While the others want to return to Subterrantea. Umbu argues that they should enjoy the pleasures of the surface world. The others are reluctant until they see a flower for the first time. They then dig through the trash and find a TV, then kill a rat to cook over an open flame.

The following day, they are looking into a diner window and get chased off by Walter, the guy who owns the place. His girlfriend, Annie, mistakes the Moloids for children and tells him to leave them alone. The three Moloids fall in love with the woman and decide to try and romance her. Standing on each others shoulder and disguising themselves with a fedora and trench coat, they go in the 99 cent store where Annie works. There, they somehow romance her by offering a flower and she sets up a date for them at 8 pm. This moron attributes their strange language and anatomy is due to the fact that she thinks they are Canadian (<sarcasm> Ha ha, very funny</sarcasm>)

They got to the local bar at 8 pm that evening where Walter becomes jealous that Annie is out with a new man. He tries to pick a fight with Annie’s date, but the three Moloids split up and flee into the night. They retreat back to their hideout to watch some more TV.

Recurring Characters

Moloids, Avengers (Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Giant-Man, Wasp), Rick Jones

Continuity Notes

  1. This of course happened in Avengers #12.

Topical References

  • A discarded drink cup has the logo belonging to McDonald’s on it. This should be considered a topical reference as this is a real world brand.

  • They also find a discarded CRT television that uses an old antenna to pick up signals. These have long since been obsolete. This story was originally published in 2008 when people were switching from CRT televisions to flatscreens of the era, so it wouldn’t have been hard to find one like this in the trash. That said, they are much less common, making this a topical reference now.

  • At the end of the story, the Moloids watch an episode of America’s Next Top Model, a reality TV show than ran from 2003 to 2018. Its reference here should be considered topical.

The Mole Man of the Ants!

A Moloid on janitorial duty ignores a sign outside the Mole Man’s lab warning his subjects to keep out. Upon entering the room he is blasted by a shrink ray. He is immediately attacked by a spider and cowers when it lunges at him. This causes the spider to be fatally impaled on the Moloid’s spear. This is witnessed by a colony of ants, who make him their king for killing the spider. The Moloid accepts the offer, going from being just another one of the rank and file to royalty!

Recurring Characters

Moloids