Giant-Size Avengers (vol. 2) #1
Gossip Girls
Credits
Note: This feature story is used to book end all of the other stories in this anthology. For the sake of clarity, this synopsis recounts the entire story.
Ms. Marvel (Carol Danvers), Black Widow (Natasha Romanov) and the Wasp (Janet Van Dyne) of the Avengers are in the middle of a battle with the BAD Girls (Diamondback, Asp, and Black Mamba).[1] After taking them down, the three Avengers decide to head back to Avengers Tower to freshen up before filing a report with Tony Stark at the SHIELD Helicarrier.[2] Carol laments how much she hates snake themed villains, particularly since she got covered in green slime.
When they arrive, the Wasp admits that Avengers Tower doesn’t really feel like home, and misses the old mansion.[3] As the women prepare to hit the showers, Janet mentions that Jarvis isn’t around to do the dry cleaning because he is working on a story for a magazine for butlers.[4] Carol fears that this is some kind of cheap sell all, but Janet assures her that it is mostly about his position as their butler more than anything else.
She then shows them a previous story he wrote for the magazine (“Good Housekeeping”) about how he managed to keep Avengers Mansion in tip-top shape, even in the middle of a battle. Carol finds the story cute, but wonders who will clean her suit. They joke about getting someone in the Initiative to do the job,[5] and this leads to talk about the much maligned Henry Gyrich. This reminds Janet of another story that Jarvis once wrote about how Gyrich ended up being worshiped by a race of other-dimensional beings (“Panegyrich”).
Janet finishes reading the tale by the time the trio are out by the pool relaxing. This leads to more joking around and talk about monitor duty is a pain. Carol disagrees, saying that exciting things happen and relates to a recent incident that started with Avengers on monitor duty (“Emperor None & The Sky Full of Moons”).
Talk about the New Avengers team, the Black Widow remarks about how much she respects Wolverine. Janet still can’t understand why Captain America and Iron Man chose him to be on the team. Natasha disagrees, saying she feels that way about why they picked Spider-Man. She can’t stand the wall-crawlers joking attitude. However, Janet knows the web-slinger a lot better and relates to when he paid his respects on the anniversary of the day the original team was disassembled (“Memorial Day”).
This convinces Natasha that she was wrong about Spider-Man. They then take a moment to reflect on the passing of Captain America and how they need to lead by his example.[5] That’s when Jarvis finally gets back and seeing the state of the trio’s costumes he promises to get them cleaned right away. They all thanks Jarvis and after putting on some spare outfits, they head off to file their report. Looking at the slime on Ms. Marvel’s costume, Jarvis quips about how much he hates snakes.
Recurring Characters
Mighty Avengers (Wasp, Black Widow, Ms. Marvel), BAD Girls Inc. (Diamondback, Asp, Black Mamba), “Edwin Jarvis”
Continuity Notes
Here, the BAD Girls are referred to as members of the Serpent Society. In truth, they are former members of the group who first joined up in Captain America #309. Diamondback first defected in Captain America #382. Asp and Black Mamba later left in issue #385 of that series. Official Index to the Marvel Universe: Avengers confirms that Diamondback and Co are fighting the Mighty Avengers as members of BAD Girls, not the Serpent Society.
At the time of this story, Tony Stark was the Director of SHIELD, starting in New Avengers #25. He will maintain this position until Secret Invasion #8.
Avengers Mansion had been the team’s headquarters since Avengers #2. In more recent times, the property was heavily damaged by the Scarlet Witch in Avengers #500-503. Tony Stark later decided to close its doors in Avengers Finale #1. It will eventually be become headquarters to the team again in New Avengers (vol. 2) #1.
The man everyone believes to be Jarvis in this story is actually a Skrull spy who took his place, as we’ll learn in Secret Invasion #1. He swapped places with the real Jarvis prior to New Avengers #1.
At the time of this story everyone believes that Captain America was murdered by an assassin in Captain America (vol. 5) #25. In reality, he was struck with a chronal bullet and is reliving his life in a constant loop. He will eventually be freed from this purgatory in Captain America: Reborn #1-6.
Good House Keeping
Jarvis writes an article for the Butler Gazette to impart advice on the being the best butler possible. He gives some straightforward down to Earth advice, relating to an incident at Avengers Mansion. What’s out of the ordinary about this tale is how Jarvis was working around a battle between the Avengers — Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Hawkeye, the Scarlet Witch, and Vision — against robot vikings from the future. As the battle rages inside the mansion, Jarvis fearlessly walks through the middle of a battle to move expensive items out of harms way and makes sure that damage is kept to a minimum.
Ultimately, the Avengers end up trashing the robots, heeding the rules that Jarvis has set forth. When the battle is over, Jarvis then dutifully cleans up all the scrapped robots and tosses them out in the trash. Returning to his charges, Captain America apologizes for the danger and explains that the attack came from the future from a foe they have yet to meet. Jarvis then notices that a sculpture recently purchased by Tony Stark had been knocked off a table and shattered on the floor. As he quickly cleans it up, Iron Man jokes that Jarvis must be slipping and everyone has a good laugh.[1]
Recurring Characters
Edwin Jarvis, Avengers (Captain Ameirca, Iron Man, Thor, Hawkeye, Scarlet Witch, Vision)
Continuity Notes
Per Official Index to the Marvel Universe: Avengers, this story takes place prior to the events of Avengers #181. Per the Sliding Timescale, that puts it as occurring roughly 7 years prior to the main story. As of this writing (April, 2024) the identity of the villain who sent the viking robots to attack the Avengers has yet to be revealed.
Panegyrich
On an alien world alien creatures celebrate the day that visitors from another world came and brought the “volt-juice” (lightning) that sustains their people after a long drought. An elder named Jifjoc agrees to tell them the tale.
It all began when the Avengers (Thor, Captain America, and Iron Man) and their government liaison Henry Gyrich ended up in this dimension after fleeing a foe named Galfrax. Gyrich orders Thor to close the portal behind them before their foe can follow. However, the thunder god refuses as doing so would leave the Earth in peril. Henry is furious because Captain America and Iron Man are in rough shape after the battle. To make matters worse, Thor also collapses. With his armor needing over five minutes to reboot, Iron Man figures they’re going to die and so he tells Gyrich that he hates him for all of the grief he causes the Avengers.[1]
Gyrich cowardly tries to escape through the portal but it closes before he can get a chance. Soon, the Avengers recover and Gyrich insists that they return to their dimension and leave Galfrax behind on this world. By this time, the alien creatures have come to see these strangers from another world. Captain America refuses to leave Galfrax behind since the aliens around them might imperil these sentient creatures.
Unable to understand the humans, the aliens misinterpret Gyrich’s words, mistaking his cowardly demands as the commands of a great leader. The Avengers quickly get their act together and destroy Galfrax. With the danger over, they prepare to head home. When some of the aliens venture too close to Gyrich, he sarcastically asks them what they are looking at. Little knowing that these words would be used by the aliens to revere the man they believe to have been their savior.
Recurring Characters
Henry Gyrich, Avengers (Captain America, Iron Man, Thor)
Continuity Notes
Per Official Index of the Marvel Universe: Avengers this story takes place prior to Avengers (vol. 3) #41. Per the Sliding Timescale, that places this flashback as happening about two years prior to the main story. The Avengers hatred of Gyrich stems from the time he was their NSA liaison from Avengers #165 to 235. Most notably when he briefly stripped their security clearance during the Korvac Saga (Avengers #167-177) and force the team to scale down its roster in issue #181.
Emperor None & The Sky of Full Moons
As an entity called Emperor None arrives in this reality to conquer it, three of the New Avengers — Luke Cage, Spider-Man (Peter Parker), and Wolverine (Logan) — are on monitor duty at Avengers Tower.[1] Luke and Logan take the opportunity to watch the football game. When there is no beer to be found in the fridge, Logan heads out to buy more. Spider-Man can’t believe they are goofing off when they are supposed to be on monitor duty. Luke explains that the only reason why he is even there is to get away from his pregnant girlfriend, Jessica Jones, and her mood swings.[2] As Peter tries to explain how important monitor duty is, the intruder alarm begins going off.
Up on the roof, Emperor None is pleased the proper dimensional alignment is in play for his coming battle with this reality’s Avengers. He is deeply disappointed when it is Luke Cage and Spider-Man who has come to face him, two people he has never encountered as Avengers in the past. He attacks them none the less, explaining that he has conquered many realities for the sake of art. When physical attacks don’t seem to slow his opponents down, Emperor None uses a device to torment his opponents with hallucinations.
For Luke Cage, it is being haunted by his unborn daughter who appears before him as a horde of undead zombies. Spider-Man, on the other hand, fears his loss of humanity and has a nightmare where he and other spider-themed heroes and villains all transform into actual spiders.
Luckily, this is when Wolverine comes back and he stabs Emperor None through the chest with his Adamantium claws. This ends the battle really quickly and — in typical fashion — the cosmic level threat vanishes in a flash of light. With the battle over, Wolverine and Luke head back inside to catch the rest of the game, suggesting that Spider-Man file the report.
Recurring Characters
New Avengers (Luke Cage, Spider-Man, Wolverine)
Continuity Notes
This flashback takes place between New Avengers #10 and 11. Per the Sliding Timescale that places it about a year prior to the main story. As of this writing (April, 2024) Emperor None’s home reality is unspecified.
This story takes place prior to the birth of Luke and Jessica’s daughter Dani in The Pulse #13.
Memorial Day
Wolverine has passed out on the couch while his body heals, giving Spider-Man a great opportunity for a prank.[1] Crawling along the ceiling, he uses his webbing to lower a picture of a Hydra soldier into Logan’s line of sight and then gives the “Avengers Assemble” battle cry. This startles Logan awake and he ends up getting tanged up in webbing trying to slash at the photo. Wolverine is furious over being the butt of another one of Spider-Man’s jokes because it takes hours for his webbing to dissolve.
This is witnessed by Captain America (Steve Rogers) and Iron Man (Tony Stark) who think that Peter’s pranks are going too far. They take Spider-Man down to the ruins of Avengers Mansion, telling him that today they are paying respects to the old team. To help them with this, Steve and Tony have called in Doctor (Stephen) Strange. Spider-Man is then taken on a mystical trip where he relives some of the Avengers greatest moments.
It starts where Spider-Man (in the place of Iron Man) relives the moment when Rick Jones first formed the Avengers to stop Loki.[2] The next, Peter stands in for Captain America when he was first found by the team, and his fight with the Sub-Mariner.[3] He also experiences various battles the Avengers have had over the years. Being present for a clash with Ultron,[4] fighting in the Kree/Skrull War,[5] and against the cosmic entity known as Korvac.[6] He experiences the team’s highest moment,[7] before its darkest day when the Scarlet Witch went mad and decimated the old team.[8]
After the experience, they show Spider-Man how people still flock to the gates of the old mansion to pay their respects. They then take him down to where the graves of Ant-Man (Scott Lang) and Hawkeye (Clint Barton) who fell that day.[9] As Spider-Man pays his respects, Captain America and Iron Man mirror the words of his late Uncle Ben, you know the one about power and responsibility.[10] Its then that Spider-Man realizes the bond he has with the Avengers one that can never be torn apart.
Recurring Characters
New Avengers (Captain America, Iron Man, Spider-Man, Wolverine), Doctor Strange
Continuity Notes
This story also takes place between New Avengers #10 and 11.
This was, of course, Avengers #1.
Captain America was revived and invited on the team in Avengers #4.
The battle with Ultron depicted here is from Avengers #66-67.
The Korvac Saga happened in Avengers #167-177.
The triumphant moment that Spider-Man experiences here is taken from the cover of Avengers (vol. 3) #38.
This of course is of the Avengers: Disassembled event, which took place in Avengers #500-503.
Ant-Man and Hawkeye were seemingly killed in that battle. However, their status as being deceased doesn’t last very long:
Hawkeye was later resurrected by the Scarlet Witch in House of M #1-8. When her reality warp ended, Hawkeye was still alive as seen in New Avengers #26.
Ant-Man’s “death” was undone when the Young Avengers and Scarlet Witch pulled Scott Lang forward in time at the moment of his death. See Avengers: The Children’s Crusade #5-6.
Uncle Ben taught Peter that “with great power comes great responsibility” back in Amazing Fantasy #15.
Topical References
Spider-Man makes two pop-culture references when he sees Doctor Strange. He asks if they are going on a trip down Wisteria Lane, the setting of the TV series Desperate Housewives as well as a mentioning the “Vulcan Mind Meld” from Star Trek. These are topical references.
The computers used by the Teen Brigade seen in the flashback are depicted with CRT style monitors. This is now an obsolete technology.
Peter Parker refers to his Uncle Ben being of the same generation as Captain America. While this was possible when this comic was first published in 2008, it is not possible now. This is due to the fact that Uncle Ben is a person with an ordinary human lifespan that lived into (albeit briefly) in the Modern Age. As a result, the Sliding Timescale has bumped the Modern Age forward enough that nobody alive during that period could have also been alive during World War II, unless their lives have been extended by other means. Modern readers could assume that Ben Paker’s sage advice was inspired by the memory of Captain America, as opposed to growing up as a member of the same generation of people.
Supplement Material
This issue features a reprint of a pin-up featured in Avengers Annual #1, as well as reprints of Avengers #58 and 201.
Shrink Wrap
Mister Fantastic (Reed Richards) of the Fantastic Four has hired Doc (Leonard) Samson to run a psychological analysis on the so-called “Fin Fang Four” to help them adjust to their new lives. When he arrives he finds Googam, Gorgilla, and Elektro and a note that Fin Fang Foom is going to be running late.
Samson decides to get things started and asks the three monsters what their ten year plans are. Googam gives a vague explanation about how he wants to earn the pride and love of his father, Goom. What he doesn’t tell Samson is that his fantasy is to conquer the world and enslave humanity in order to do so. Gorgilla, on the other hand, hopes to one day become President of the United States. His first order of business in this role would make bananas free for everyone. When he asks Elektro what he wants, the robot suddenly sputters into speaking in binary code. His dream is marrying Roberta, the Fantastic Four’s robotic receptionist, and starting a family with her. This is all lost on Samson because he doesn’t speak in 1s and 0s.
That’s when Fin Fang Foom arrives and orders that this evaluation be stopped immediately. He has secured a lawyer from Landau, Luckman, and Lake who objects to his clients being analyzed based on human cognitional standards. This leads to insults being hurled between the four and soon they start coming to blows. Caught in the middle of the fracas, Samson manages to slip away just as Richards calls to see how things are going. Narrowly avoiding a thrown chair, Samson tells Reed he’ll call him back and stresses over how he is going to get this situation under control.
Recurring Characters
Fin Fang Four (Fin Fang Foom, Googam, Gorgilla, Elektro), Doc Samson, Roberta, Mister Fantastic (voice)