The Big Splice

Simon Williams, aka Wonder Man, has reluctantly accepted a stunt man gig on the set of an action film. When he is supposed to be involved in a truck explosion, the director is furious that Simon’s Wonder Man costume is visible under his shredded clothes. Simon explains that he wore his costume because he once had an unfortunate incident in the past with a stunt like this that he doesn’t want to repeat.[1] He is also fed up of doing stunt roles as Simon has aspirations of being a legitimate actor and only did this gig at the behest of his agent, Neal Saroyan, who he now wants to fire.

When Wonder Man returns to his apartment he meets his landlord Gloria Angel outside as she is watering the lawn and learns that she was once an actress decades earlier. He also meets two of his neighbors, the flamboyant Aundray Phelps and dancer LaHoya Scripps. When he gets inside his apartment he manages to catch a phone call from his agent, Neal Saroyan. Simon is about to fire Neal when the agent tells him that a studio is interested in casting him in a serious role where he plays a tormented painter. Simon relents and decides to give Saroyan one last chance to do right by him and agrees to meet with the studio. On his way out, Williams runs into another neighbor an experimental filmmaker named Argus LaVecchio. Argus tries to convince Simon to be in his indie film which will explore the philosophies of anarchist Peter Kropotkin and Soviet filmmaker Sergei Eisenstein. Simon is so uninterested he insults Argus’ hair before leaving. LaVecchio vows that he will one day make Simon Williams see him for the visionary that he is.

As Wonder Man leaps to the Unimedia/Cinefaxx studio he doesn’t realize that he is being lured there by the studio’s criminal owner, Lotus Newmark. When he arrives, one of the security guards identifies him as the person who recently attacked the set of the dinosaur movie they have in production.[2] Presuming that Wonder Man might be investigating her after her gang war with Hawkeye, she has hired the mercenary named Splice to eliminate him.[3] After getting a brief run down on Wonder Man’s history and powers he is confident that he can eliminate the target.[4] When Simon arrives on set he realizes that this was the same one he almost trashed while under the spell of the Enchantress. He also bumps into Alex Flores, the screenwriter he met during that fiasco. When she asks what he’s doing here he tells her about his role and his aspirations of becoming a serious actor so he won’t be regarded as this superpowered muscle head suited for brainless roles. Alex doesn’t recall Unimedia having a film about a painter on its slate, but wishes him luck after admitting that he’s not as shallow as she first thought. After Simon leaves, Alex decides to pay closer attention to him as he might be useful for pitching future movie ideas.

When Simon enters the soundstage where he meeting is to take place, he is confronted by Splice who explains that he is a hired assassin. Wonder Man at first doesn’t think that a normal man with high-tech gadgets will be a match for him. However, Splice has done his homework and keeps Simon disorientated with various electrical attacks, gas grenades, and shooting a tiny mortar shell down his throat. That’s when Alex enters the room to look for Simon. This prompts Splice to come after her so there are no witnesses to confess to his crimes. Unfortunately for him, this gives Wonder Man time to recover and he ambushes his would-be assassin. While the two scuffle, Alex grabs an exposed wire and tosses it at Splice, shocking him into unconsciousness. Simon is grateful for her assist, saying that he owes her one. Alex takes advantage of this by asking him out so they can talk about her movie ideas.

Moments later, Lotus Newmark gets word that Splice has been arrested by the police. She tells her assistant to let him stew in a jail cell for a while for his failure and to look into alternatives to go after Wonder Man again.

Recurring Characters

Wonder Man, Splice, Lotus Newmark, Gloria Angel, Aundray Phelps, LaHoya Scripps, Neal Saroyan, Argus LaVecchio, Alex Flores

Continuity Notes

1. Wonder Man is referring to the time he was the lead actor in the Damage Control movie. See Damage Control (vol. 3) #3.

2. Wonder Man was forced to attack Cinefaxx’s studio in Wonder Man (vol. 2) #2 while under the spell of the Enchantress.

3. For more on Lotus Newmark’s criminal operations and her clashes with Hawkeye see Avengers Spotlight #30-36.

4. Lotus mentions how Wonder Man once died and came back to life, that happened in Avengers #9 and he was resurrected in Avengers #151. She also mentions he used to fly with a jet back but now gets around by leapling around like Hulk. Wonder Man’s trademark jetpack was destroyed last issue. The Hulk has been using his super strong legs to leap great distances since way back in Incredible Hulk #1.

Topical References

• Gloria Angel is singing the song “They Can’t Take That Away From Me”, a popular song that was composed by Ira and George Greshwin back in 1937. It was first performed by Fred Astaire in the film Shall We Dance. It has been covered countless times since. The reason Gloria is singing it here is because it is hinting at her past career as an actress. This Wonder Man series presents Gloria as though she was an actress during the “Golden Age of Cinema” which was between the 1910s and the 1960s. As evidence when she states that she was a star in the 1940s. Due to the Sliding Timescale, any references to Gloria being an actor from that period should be considered topical. That isn’t to say she wouldn’t be singing this song. As I’ve said it has been covered multiple times, the most recent being in 2017.

• Aundray Phelps is depicted as being overly flamboyant and over the top. I think the implication here is that he is gay. While there’s nothing wrong with that, the way the character is depicted is considered a negative stereotype by many in that community and his presentation here should be considered topical since this cringe worthy trope was actually considered comedy around the time this story was published.

• Wonder Man is depicted as having a physical answering machine that records messages on tape. This should be considered a topical reference as the advent of voice mail has made this technology obsolete.

• Neal Saroyan brags about owning a Ferrari. This should be considered topical as it is a real world automobile.

• On his desk, Neal has two tiny figurines of Mighty Mouse and Marvin the Martian. Since these characters are not owned by Marvel or its parent companies these appearances should also be considered topical.

• When talking about her screenplay based on Wonder Man’s recent battle with the Enchantress, Alex says it is a combination of films like Jacob’s Ladder and The Exorcist. Jacob’s Ladder was a 1990 psychological thriller/horror film about a Vietnam veteran who was plagued by disturbing hallucinations, while The Exorcist was a 1973 horror film about a girl being possessed by the devil. These references should be considered topical references as Alex is making film references that were contemporary for the time this comic was published. If she were making this conversation today there are more relevant films that she could reference in its place (such as the 2019 remake of Jacob’s Ladder and the 2023 remake of The Exorcist ^_^)