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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Spider-Man Versus Wolverine #1

Spider-Man Versus Wolverine #1

High Tide

Years Ago:

Wolverine has come to Berlin to assist his friend Charlie, and the pair found themselves fleeing from Russian spies who want to kill them. With Charlie, whose real name is Charlemaign, injured Wolverine has to face the mob of spies alone. Wolverine relished this, slicing through the spies, smiling the whole time. With their attackers all dead, Wolverine turns to see that Charlie had disappeared in the confusion. He finds a heart-shaped locket there, a private joke between the two. Wolverine never saw Charlie again.

Now:

Spider-Man is web-slinging across New York City looking to take newsworthy photos to sell to the Daily Bugle. Suddenly, Spider-Man witnesses a teenaged girl screaming while running down the street. He also notices a woman who is dressed too fancy for such a rough neighborhood but ignores her to see what is wrong with the teen. The youth is upset about Sophie and Bert, owners a local grocery store. Spider-Man swings down there to see what's wrong and discovers that both have been killed with gunshots to the head. Spider-Man takes photos of the grisly scene and heads back to the Daily Bugle. Changing back to Peter Parker, he is surprised when Kate Cushing buys his pictures without her usual critique of his style. J. Jonah Jameson then pulls Peter aside, intending to send him on an assignment for Now Magazine. They are interrupted by Ned Leeds who needs to talk to Jameson right away. This allows Peter to slip away as he is running late for dinner at his Aunt May's house.

However, when he arrives at Aunt May's house, dinner is already over with. He spends some time with his Aunt and her boarders for a while before he and Mary Jane are sent off to enjoy the evening together. The couple catches a movie in Times Square. As they leave the theater, Peter's spider-sense begins going off and he warns Mary Jane to run for cover. Slipping into an alley, Peter changes into Spider-Man, just as a sniper begins opening fire on the crowd. However, when Spider-Man arrives on the scene, the police begin firing at him. With a SWAT team arriving, Spider-Man realizes that there is nothing to do and he grudgingly leaves. He returns to Mary Jane's apartment where Mary Jane is waiting for him. Peter paces the room until Mary Jane can't stand it and tells him that he can't save everyone. However, Peter can't let it go and in the heat of the moment kisses Mary Jane before leaving to see what he can do. While back at the Daily Bugle, Ned Leeds goes over his investigation of Russian spies and points out that all of the recent murders in the city were all Russian spies. He shows Jameson evidence that the killer is Charlemagne, the freelance operative that has not been seen for many years. Ned wants to investigate it further, and requests money and a photographer from Jameson.

At this moment, Peter Parker has decided that he should give up being Spider-Man and tosses aside his costume. Needing to get out of the city, Peter begins packing a bag when his phone rings. It's Jameson, who wants him to go on assignment with Leeds. Later, in Berlin, Wolverine has returned after learning that his pal Charlie is active again. The deaths of Russian spies were a means of sending a message to Logan, and wonders why he has come. Walking down the streets, Logan thinks about how he came to Berlin despite the protests from Storm, the X-Men's leader, who is concerned over recent attacks on their group. Wolverine's senses warn him of two men approaching him from behind. However, he dismisses that they are Russian spies given their mannerisms. Logan lures them into a trap and ambushes them in the bushes. He decides against killing the muggers and lets them go. However, the Russian spies that have been tailing him reveal themselves by shooting the muggers dead. He confronts the two assassins but spares them when they leave, knowing that they are only trying to get a lead on Charlie. Logan then returns to his hotel room where he begins meditating.

The next day, Wolverine continues his search for Charlie, walking down the streets of Berlin. He passes by Ned Leeds and Peter Parker, who is investigating Ned's story. Although Wolverine doesn't recognize who Peter is, he identifies his scent as that belonging for Spider-Man. He wonders what the wall-crawler is doing in Berlin, and wonders they are on the same side. Later, Peter is back in his hotel room finishing a phone call with his Aunt May. That's when Wolverine climbs into his hotel room through the window. Peter tries to deny that he is Spider-Man. However, Wolverine doesn't buy it and goes through Parker's luggage and finds his web-shooters and cartridge belt. Logan insists the Spider-Man accompany him, but Peter tries to explain that he didn't bring his costume. Wolverine doesn't care and leaps out the window. With no other choice, Peter follows after Wolverine. Along the way, Logan is convinced that Spider-Man isn't in league with the spies. He tells Peter of his recent encounter with the spies and the dead bodies that ended up in their wake. He warns Peter that things are going to get ugly, and warns him to leave while he still can. Peter asks if this has anything to do with the Charlemagne character that Ned Leeds is looking into. Again, Wolverine warns Peter to leave immediately and to convince Ned to go with him.

Peter then walks back to his hotel room, thinking about how he made a mistake running away from his problems back home. When he arrives outside his hotel room, he notices that the door is open and there is the smell of smoke. There he discovers that someone has tied Ned to a chair and slit his throat. As he tries to process Ned's murder, he doesn't realize that there are gunmen in the room. When he does, it is too late. The men try to question him in German and Russian. Before they can kill Peter, Wolverine comes crashing through the window. He pulls Peter out through the window. On the street, Logan tells Peter to get out of the country and go back home. Parker then goes to a nearby bus station, intending to take Wolverine's advice, but can't bring himself to run back home while Ned's killers are on the loose. Peter then goes to a nearby costume shop to buy a costume. Unfortunately, the only costume that he has on hand is a facsimile of his original red and blue costume. This is embarrassing at first, but once Peter is in costume he finally feels free. Having tagged Wolverine with a spider-tracer, Spider-Man begins following the signal. Along the way, he runs into the authorities who open to fire on him, but he manages to slip away.

Following the signal, Spider-Man crashes into a hotel room but finds a young couple there instead of Wolverine. There he finds his tracer attached to a note from Logan, the note warns Spider-Man that he is in over his head and to go home. Meanwhile, Wolverine has tracked Charlemagne to a steel mill that is a front for Russian spies. There he finds Charlie's handiwork and finds her waiting for him. She is happy to see him and kisses him, telling Wolverine that it has been a while. She then takes him to her mansion outside of Berlin. There she explains that intelligence agencies all over the world are seeking to eliminate her and that there is nowhere left she can hide. Logan picks Charlie up into his arms, tells her that she doesn't need to hide, and carries her upstairs to the bedroom. Later, Logan and Charlie go out for dinner. As they are given their meal, Logan's senses pick up poison and suggests that they get out of there. Knowing that they are not getting out without a fight, Wolverine and Charlie are about to fight for their life, when suddenly Spider-Man comes crashing into the dining room from the kitchen. Spider-Man leaps over to Logan and Charlie's table, where he discovers that his rescue mission was unnecessary.

While Spider-Man and Wolverine deal with the assassins, Charlie manages to escape. The pair then leaves the restaurant. After putting on his costume, Wolverine explains Charlie's predicament and they begin trying to find her. The pair crash through another Russian spy front and after incapacitating the guards, they discover that Charlie had already been there and killed more of her would-be assassins. Wolverine has grown more concerned and tells Spider-Man that they need to find her before its too late. Spider-Man, however, feels ineffectual and wonders why he is getting involved with killers who are killing each other. However, he reminds himself that he needs to avenge Ned Leeds death. The pair begin crashing more spy fronts but every time they arrive to late to stop Charlie. Wolverine becomes fed up and blames Spider-Man for his interference preventing him from stopping Charlie. Wolverine goes back to his hotel room to meditate, waiting for Charlie to call, while Peter tosses and turns in his. Eventually, Charlie calls Wolverine and he meets her at a nearby cemetery. With all her assassins dead, Wolverine warns her that the authorities will be after her.

With no other way out, she asks Wolverine to kill her, so she doesn't end up in a foreign gulag. Wolverine places his claws to her stomach and extracts his claws. However, he flinches and his cut wasn't fatal. As he tries to think of something to say before the final fatal blow. However, before he can do it, Spider-Man catches his arm in a web-line. The wall-crawler is horrified to see that Wolverine is about to kill Charlie. Wolverine tries to tell Spider-Man that he doesn't understand the lives they live and tries to put Charlie out of her misery once again. Unfortunately, Spider-Man refuses to sit idly by and watch Logan kill someone. The two come to blows, and Spider-Man realizes that he may have gotten in too deep. With Wolverine going into full berserker mode, Spider-Man finds himself fighting for his life. However, he isn't willing to just let himself get killed, because of his unresolved feelings for Mary Jane. Spider-Man lays into Wolverine and manages to get a number of powerful blows. Wolverine manages to bowl Spider-Man over and is about to make a killing blow. Spider-Man then grabs the feral mutant by the throat. Wolverine then calls Spider-Man's bluff, pointing out that the wall-crawler could easily snap his neck, but won't, because he can't bring himself to kill.

Wolverine is furious that Spider-Man interfered in his plan to stop Charlie from committing more killings. Before the fight can be resolved, a police helicopter appears over the cemetery. While Spider-Man is distracted, his spider-sense goes off. Thinking it's Wolverine trying to attack him, he turns and punches without thinking and realizes that he has fatally punch Charlie in the face. The wall-crawler is horrified by what he has done. Wolverine catches Charlie as she goes down, and asks her why she had to do this, as they could have had a life together. She calls him a bad liar and dies in his arms. Wolverine realizes that Charlie intentionally, using Spider-Man's blow to commit suicide. He thinks about Spider-Man, and figures that the wall-crawler will be processing this for a long time. Suddenly, they are surrounded by armed men, but when Wolverine tells them that Charlie is dead, they quickly depart. The next day, Peter and Logan leave the country, Parker haunted by what he has done. They don't say much to each other and don't even say goodbye, Wolverine understands and doesn't see much point in it. When Peter finally gets home, he gets a call from J. Jonah Jameson who is impressed by Peter's photos. However, when he asks where Ned Leeds is, Peter can't handle it and hangs up the phone. Suddenly, there is a knock at the door, it's Mary Jane who has come to see Peter now that he is back. With so many bad feelings, Peter could use a friend and invites her in.

Recurring Characters

Spider-Man, Wolverine, J. Jonah Jameson, Kate Cushing, Ned Leeds, Mary Jane Watson, Aunt May, Victor Palermo, Rose Polermo, Nathan Lubensky, Storm, Havok

Continuity Notes

  • This story has many Cold War references, particularly the fact that Berlin is divided between the East and the West with the Berlin Wall between the two. In addition to this, the Russian spies are referred to as the KGB. These should be considered topical references per the Sliding Timescale of Earth-616. This is because all events in this story take place in the modern age. Particularly when divide of Berlin was torn down in 1989. Likewise, the KGB dissolved in 1991 and was replaced with Federal Security Service and the Foreign Intelligence Service. This flashback takes place after Wolverine's battle against the Hulk in Incredible Hulk #182, as such it occurred roughly three years prior to this story, per the Sliding Timescale.

  • Spider-Man mentions that it is the 1980s, this should be considered a topical reference per the Sliding Timescale of Earth-616. He also mentions how he got his powers, as detailed in Amazing Fantasy #15.

  • Mary Jane is looking at old photos of herself, Flash Thompson, Liz Allan, Harry Osborn, and Gwen Stacy. Peter states that they were the "good old days" from when they were in high school. However, Peter never went to high school with Mary Jane or Gwen Stacy, having met both after he began attending Empire State University in Amazing Spider-Man #31.

  • Peter and Mary Jane haven't been an item since she turned down his proposal in Amazing Spider-Man #183. This story sees a renewal of their romance.

  • This story occurs not long after the Mutant Massacre event that occurred in Uncanny X-Men #210-213, an attack by the Marauders forced the X-Men to flee their headquarters. The "infiltration" that Storm mentions is the recent possession of Dazzler by Malice in Uncanny X-Men #214.

  • Spider-Man and Wolverine first met in Marvel Team-Up Annual #1.

  • The details of Ned Leeds murder are revealed in Amazing Spider-Man #289.

  • Spider-Man is depicted slipping over the Berlin Wall and clashing with the East Berlin military. This, of course, is a topical reference per the Sliding Timescale of Earth-616.

  • Although Ned is murdered here, he is resurrected years later, as seen in Clone Conspiracy #4, or so it seemed. This Ned Leeds was killed during a battle between Spider-Man in Amazing Spider-Man (vol. 5) #14-15. Not long after this, another man claiming to be the real Ned Leeds appeared. He claimed that he took the Goblin formula prior to his death here. Thus he was able to survive getting his throat slit thanks to the regenerative properties of said formula. However, these claims have yet to be substantiated at the time of this writing (December, 2021). See Amazing Spider-Man (vol. 5) #67-69.

Amazing Spider-Man #288

Amazing Spider-Man #288

Amazing Spider-Man #289

Amazing Spider-Man #289