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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Amazing Spider-Man #671

Amazing Spider-Man #671

A New Hope

In Alphabet City, Mary Jane Watson has finally gotten the spider-powers that have spread to nearly everyone in the city. Now she is using these powers to help defend the innocent people at Our Lady of Saints Church who have been cured by Anti-Venom from the citizens of the city that have fully mutated into massive spiders. She tells the cured people to get behind her, telling them that she is all the hero they need.

At the NYC Emergency Command Center, mayor J. Jonah Jameson has transformed into a spider-monster and, under the mental control of the Queen, is attempting to kill the Spider-Slayer, who has come up with a solution to the spider-plague. Spider-Man fights to keep the mayor from killing his foe. Jonah puts up a good fight, but ultimately Spider-Man knocks him out and webs him to the floor. With Jameson contained, Spider-Man rushes to the Spider-Slayer and begins applying pressure to the wound on his neck and calls for a medic.[1] With the situation under control, Spider-Man tells Glory Grant to lock down the facility and toss anyone else who begins changing in with Jonah, telling her that he is going to Horizon Labs where they are working on a cure.

Mentally linked to J. Jonah Jameson, the Queen hears this from her hideout at Belvedere Castle in Central Park. She cannot believe that this is happening under her nose, but the Jackal points out that she should have used her control of the mayor to try and break the quarentine. She now reaches out to see if anyone within Horizon Labs is under her control. At that moment, Mister Fantastic has synthesized a cure and is about to inject Sajani Jaffrey with it. The Queen takes hold of her mind and forces her transformation into a spider-creature to try and resist the cure. Luckily, Spider-Woman is there to restrain Jaffrey long enough for Reed to inject her with a cure. As Sajani returns to human form, Reed notes that she wasn’t due to transform for hours and suspects that there is another force at work

Back in Central Park, the Queen feels her connection to Jaffrey as it servers. She then tries to command her Spider-King, Steve Rogers, and learns that she has lost her connection to him as well.[2] She tells the Jackal to do something about this. The geneticist, who is reading the issue of Scientific American that has an article about Peter Parker in it, tells the Queen that he already has a plan in motion as he has a “man on the inside” who knows how Peter Parker thinks, pointing to the Tarantula, who confirms this is true.[3]

Back at Horizon Labs, Grady Scraps and Bella Fishbach tell Anti-Venom about the process they are using to create a cure for the spider-plague by using the anti-bodies within his symbiote. They warn him that the process will strip him of all of the alien material effectively making Eddie Brock a normal human again. Brock, to his credit, is willing to make this sacrifice to save the city. With his consent, Horizon Lab’s mysterious sixth scientist — their identity obscured by a hazmat suit — tells their colleagues that they would like to work alone. With the other two done, the sixth scientist admits that he envies Eddie Brock because he is able to give up being a monster, something that they cannot do so easily. With the process set in motion, the sixth scientist decides it is time to leave because they have compromised themselves enough over this. Accessing an escape hatch with a hand print scan, the sixth scientist — who is actually Morbius the Living Vampire — strips off his hazmat suit and leaves through the sewers beneath the lab.

Meanwhile, Spider-Man is heading back to Horizon Labs, kicking himself for not thinking about using his scientific genius to come up with a solution. Along the way he comes upon Gravity and Firestar who are defending one of the spider-sense jammers that are keeping the infected inside the city. When Spider-Man offers his help, they refuse it, telling him they have the situation well under control.[4] Madame Web watches Spider-Man leave the scene wondering if this was the right move because her ability to see the future is still clouded by all of the spiders that have appeared on the web of fate. Since she is unsure, she decides to assist Firestar and Gravity as the time for passive observance has passed.

Back at Horizon Labs, the Thing leads the counter-attack as soldiers and the NYPD’s Anti-Spider-Man Squad defend the lab from invading spiders. Growing tired, the Thing goes to look for Spider-Woman for help, warning the soldiers that the spiders are starting to become smarter and more organized for some reason. Inside, Mister Fantastic is learning how Project Rebirth was able to synthesize a cure on their end, something that should be impossible without access to a symbiote of their own. General Brad Dodge tells Richards that information is unimportant to this time and the only thing he can confirm is that they used their own version of the cure to restore the Spider-King to human form and, as it turns out, he was Steve Rogers the whole time.

That’s when Madame Web appears in the room and warns Reed Richards that their spider-sense jammers are the real source cutting off her ability to see the future and orders him to shut them down so she can look into the future and find a solution to this problem before vanishing again.[5] Hearing this Max Modell comes up with an idea how they can use the signal jammers to restore Spider-Man’s lost spider-sense and calls on the rest of Horizon Labs to help him fix Spider-Man.[6] At that same moment, Spider-Man has arrived on the rooftops of Horizon Labs and uses his hand print to get access to his private lab. He is concerned because the hand reader gives an error stating that Peter Parker is already in the lab. That’s when he is ambushed by the Tarantula who has a tablet strapped to his chest to allow the Jackal to observe and communicate with Spider-Man. At first, the web-slinger is confused as to how the Tarantula got into his lab, but the Jackal reveals that the Tarantula is his clone, Kaine.

As Spider-Man battles the Tarantula, the Jackal explains that he has dispatched his loyal slave to destroy the cure for the spider-plague with a deadly toxin. Spider-Man tries to reason with Kaine, but he is too deeply under the Jackal’s control to listen to reason. The Tarantula easily overpowers Spider-Man and enters he next lab where the process of stripping Eddie Brock of his Anti-Venom symbiote has just completed. The Tarantula is about to drop the toxin into the vat holding the cure, but Spider-Man manages to snatch it with his webbing. The Tarantula then uses his own webbing to yank Spider-Man over the vat. As the two struggle the scientists at Horizon Lab complete their work and activate the device that restores Spider-Man’s spider-sense. Feeling his power return, Spider-Man now has the edge of the Tarantula and easily defeats him, knocking the Tarantula into the vat of the cure.

When Kaine emerges from the vat he has been restored to human form and warns Spider-Man that the Jackal has been working for the Queen this entire time. The effort to restore Spider-Man’s spider-sense has also restored Madame Web’s ability to see the future but the power is so amplified that the visions of what the Queen will do next overwhelm her. While back at the Jackal’s hideout, the Jackal reports that he lost contact with the Tarantula. No longer able to sense him either, the Queen decides that the Jackal has failed her for the last time and kills him with her sonic scream.[7] The Queen realizes that her powers have been boosted to levels that she has never had before. Seeing this as well Madame Web realizes that her efforts to restore her visions have had the unintended consequence of giving the Queen the powers of a god and she has doomed them all.[8]

Recurring Characters

Spider-Man, Mary Jane Watson, The Queen, Jackal, Mister Fantastic, Thing, Madame Web, Spider-Woman, Anti-Venom, Max Modell, Grady Scraps, Bella Fishbach, Sajani Jaffrey, Uatu Jackson, Morbius the Living Vampire, Gravity, Firestar, Tarantula, Spider-Slayer, J. Jonah Jameson, Glory Grant, Brad Dodge, Aaron MacKenzie, Kate Glover

Continuity Notes

  1. Jonah keeps on muttering “I failed her” over and over. This is a reference to his wife, Marla Madison, whom the Spider-Slayer murdered in Amazing Spider-Man #654.

  2. Steve Rogers was transformed into the Spider-King back in Amazing Spider-Man #666. He has restored to human form thanks to the efforts of Agent Venom in Venom (vol. 2) #8.

  3. The Tarantula knows how Peter Parker thinks because he’s actually Kaine, a clone of Peter Parker. As revealed in issue #667

  4. Firestar and Gravity remind Spider-Man of their credentials:

    • Firestar mentions how she was a founding member of the New Warriors, who were first formed in Thor #411. She also mentions how she was an Avenger long before Spider-Man was. She joined the team in Avengers (vol. 3) #4.

    • Technically, Firestar isn’t correct about being an Avenger before him. Spider-Man had reserve status on the team since Avengers #329, although he didn’t formally join an Avengers team until New Avengers #1.

    • Gravity mentions how he used to be the Protector of the Universe. See Fantastic Four #544-546 and Black Panther (vol. 4) #27. He returned to Earth shortly thereafter.

  5. Madame Web mentions how the same device was used to strip Spider-Man of his spider-sense. That also happened in Amazing Spider-Man #654. Mister Fantastic mentions how he was trying to find a cure for this. Reed became aware of the problem in Amazing Spider-Man #659.

  6. Max mentions the times that Spider-Man has protected Horizon Labs and its interests. The first was the time he defended the lab from the Hobgoblin in Amazing Spider-Man #649-651 and later defended a shuttle launch that was bringing supplies to Horizon Labs’ space station in Amazing Spider-Man #652-654.

  7. This is not the real Jackal but a clone sent to act on his behalf as we’ll learn in Amazing Spider-Man #673.

  8. Spider-Island continues in Venom (vol. 2) #8 and Spider-Island: The Amazing Spider-Girl #3.

Amazing Spider-Man #670

Amazing Spider-Man #670

Amazing Spider-Man #672

Amazing Spider-Man #672