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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Avengers #146

Avengers #146

The Assassin Never Fails!

Captain America is dying in the hospital and nobody knows why. The Avengers and the Falcon wait at Avengers Mansion for news on Cap’s condition. The Scarlet Witch is deeply upset that there is nothing they can do. As Yellowjacket tries to calm her, the Beast explains to the Falcon that Cap is suffering from a mysterious type of radiation poisoning. All the while, none of them are aware that they are being observed by minions of the Assassin, who has been hired to eliminate Earth’s Mightiest Heroes. With everyone in their places, they begin preparing for the next phase of their plan.

Meanwhile, Thor — in his mortal guise of Don Blake — performs an operation that should save Captain America’s life thanks to a device created by Stark Industries to absorb the radiation. Standing guard is Iron Man to prevent whoever tried to kill Cap from finishing the job. In order to protect Thor’s double-identity, Iron Man has brought a Life Model Decoy to stand in for the thunder god while he is in his mortal guise.[1]

With things secure in the operating theater, Iron Man returns outside where the Vision and Hawkeye are waiting. They are offered fresh cups of coffee by one of the nurses. Little do they know that the coffee had been drugged, or that the Assassin’s minions are waiting for it to take effect before launching an ambush. As the poison begins doing its magic, the armed men attack. Iron Man tries his best to take down their attackers but is quickly gassed to sleep. Going into the next room they find the LMD of Thor and, thinking it is the real thunder god, blast him with their weapons. They are amazed that they were able to kill a god, little knowing they actually gunned down a decoy. Hearing the commotion outside, Don Blake orders the others to focus on the operation, telling them that the Avengers can handle whatever is going on outside. By this time, the Vision is the only Avenger left standing, but he soon falls when the Assassin arrives and plants a device on his back that can incapacitate the android. When checking on Thor’s body, the Assassin discovers that it isn’t the real thunder god, but a robot.

Putting two-and-two together, the Assassin realizes that Thor and Don Blake are the same person and prepares to shoot the doctor as he works. Luckily, Hawkeye threw up the poisoned coffee and is able to spoil the Assassin’s shot. Iron Man and the Vision have also recovered and quickly join the archer.[2] In the ensuing battle, the Assassin is blasted by Iron Man, ruining their hooded cowl. The three Avengers are surprised to see that not only is the Assassin a woman, but also the nurse who brought them their coffee earlier. Using a smoke bomb to cover her escape, the Assassin tries to rally her minions. However, they have never seen their employer without her mask on and assume it’s some kind of trap and open fire. Ironically, the Assassin dies by the hands of her own minions. Later, Captain America pulls through thanks to the emergency surgery and is expected to make a full recovery.

Meanwhile, the man who hired the Assassin is confronted by his son Angelo, who is furious that he sent the Assassin to her death. The heated argument becomes fatal when Angelo is shot by his own father. As it turns out, the Assassin was his daughter — Maria — and feeling that he had failed both of his children, the man puts the gun to his head next.

Recurring Characters

Avengers (Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Yellowjacket, Wasp, Hawkeye, Scarlet Witch, the Vision, the Beast), Assassin, Falcon

Continuity Notes

  1. Iron Man and Thor have known each other’s secret identities since Avengers #113.

  2. Iron Man muses to himself that the poison didn’t work due to his synthetic heart. Tony Stark’s heart was injured in a mine explosion in Tales of Suspense #39. He was plagued with a heart condition for some time until he was given a transplant in Iron Man #19.

Avengers #145

Avengers #145

Avengers #147

Avengers #147