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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Captain America #111

Captain America #111

Tomorrow You Live, Tonight I Die!

Called to a local carnival by Nick Fury, Steve Rogers pauses at a fortune teller machine to pass the time while he is waiting. It spits out a fortune that reads “Tomorrow you live, tonight I die!” While he ponders this strange fortune, he narrowly avoids getting shot by a Hydra hit squad. They reveal that it was easy for them to catch up with Captain America since he publicly revealed his true identity.[1] As he fights off his attackers, Cap demands to know the true identity of Madame Hydra.[2] However, the Hydra assassins flee, using an animatronic cowboy to provide cover fire. Pinned behind a phone booth, Cap destroys the automation with his shield. Fearing that Rick Jones might be Hydra’s next target he heads back home to make sure Rick is safe.

Meanwhile, the assassins have returned to their hideout to report back to Madame Hydra. She is furious that they failed to eliminate Captain America and holds the leader of the hit squad accountable. As punishment, she hands him a literal warrant of death, a piece of paper that gives off deadly fumes.

Later, at Avengers Mansion, Steve Rogers is continuing Rick Jone’s training by having the young man watch footage of the original Bucky. Being compared to Captain America’s old sidekick deeply upsets Rick.[3] Seeing this, Cap reminds himself that it took years for his old sidekick to become an efficient fighting machine. He then tells Rick to cheer up and suggests some more hands-on training. However, this does little to improve Rick’s mood and he eventually gets so depressed he considers himself nothing compared to the original Bucky and decides to retire for the night.

A few hours later, Rick is the only one at the mansion when someone rings the doorbell. Going to answer it, Rick finds that a letter had been dropped inside addressed to Captain America. Deciding to see what it is, Rick opens the envelope and is exposed to psychoactive drugs that cause him to hallucinate. In this hallucination, Rick sees himself running through ruins until the figure of Death points him to a nearby door in the middle of an empty void. Opening it up, he finds the original Bucky on the other side taunting him as his body rapidly decomposes then explodes. As Bucky collapses to the floor, the two Hydra agents who planet the envelope force their way inside and find him.

Moments later, Steve Rogers returns home and finds the discarded letter. He quickly determines it was drugged and deduces that Hydra has kidnapped Rick. Rushing outside he catches the Hydra agents trying to escape with Rick in his vehicle. Unfortunately, despite his best efforts to stop them, the driver manages to escape with Rick in the back seat. Jones is raced back to Hydra headquarters where Madame Hydra orders him to be eliminated immediately. She also figures that Captain America will return to the penny arcade to look for clues and orders a trap be placed there for him. Unfortunately, her soldiers are lax with eliminating Rick and he manages to escape. Angered over this, Madame Hydra orders her men to capture the boy before he can warn their enemy.

As Rick races to the carnival with Madame Hydra hot on his heels, Captain America arrives at the penny arcade. There he is ambushed by Hydra’s robotic Mankiller. During the fight, the robot opens vents in its chest to unleash a barrage of missiles. Quick thinking, Cap rushes the robot and his shield deflects the missiles destroying the Mankiller. In the aftermath of the battle, the fortune from earlier slips out and Captain America reads it again and gets a sudden moment of inspiration.

Moments later, both Rick Jones and Hydra arrive on the scene. Both spot Cap on a nearby rooftop. However, when Rick tries to warn Cap that Hydra is about to open fire, Steve appears to leap out over the water — putting him in the direct path of a hail of bullets. Struck multiple times, the body then falls into the river. Assuming they have killed Captain America, Madame Hydra orders her minions to retreat. Police soon arrive on the scene and begin dredging the water. All they are able to recover are Captain America’s bullet-riddled costume and a life-like latex mask, leading them to believe that Steve Rogers was just an alias.[4]

Recurring Characters

Captain America, Bucky, Hydra (Madame Hydra)

Continuity Notes

  1. Steve Rogers briefly tried retiring as Captain America, revealing his public in the process. He was convinced to return to action by Nick Fury. See Tales of Suspense #95-96.

  2. Madame Hydra’s name remains a mystery for years. The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe A-Z #12 reveals that her real name is Ophelia Sarkissian.

  3. Mention is made here how the original Bucky — James Barnes — is believed to be dead. This has been the case since Avengers #4. However, years later in Captain America (vol. 5) #14, Cap will learn that Bucky survived World War II and was transformed into an assassin called the Winter Soldier by the Russians.

  4. This whole plot is an attempt to walk-back Captain America’s true identity. We’ll learn in issue #113 that Captain America faked his death. However, Avengers #107 reveals that the Space Phantom will use a device to erase everyone’s memories of Captain America’s true identity, thus making this really flimsy spectacle to work. Cap’s identity will remain a secret until his publicly outs himself again in Captain America (vol. 4) #3.

Topical References

  • A lot of the attractions at the penny arcade are dated. For example:

    • The prices to activate an animatronic cowboy and the fortune teller are ten cents. The photobooth is 25 cents. Adults could also buy an Italian-made switchblade for $4.99.

    • Speaking of the switchblades. Owning one in the city of New York was illegal even when this story was published back in 1969. However, ownership of these types of knives was recently decriminalized in 2019. Either way, selling them at a carnival was against the law, while some crooked vendor might have gotten away with this in 1969, I highly doubt this would fly today.

    • There is also a bank of Kinetoscopes on display. They are basically tiny film projectors. You fed it some money, you bend down to look into a viewer and turned a crank to play a short silent film. They were quite popular in the early 1900s and were a novelty at carnivals like this. In the day of cell phones that can stream video, you can understand why these things went obsolete a long time ago.

  • The drugged letter that Hydra delivers to Avengers Mansion is somehow slid under the front door. This would not be a thing possible today. If you don’t believe me, try it. Modern readers could probably assume the front door to Avengers Mansion has a mail slot (which are still a thing) or something.

Captain America #110

Captain America #110

Captain America #112

Captain America #112