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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Captain America #334

Captain America #334

Basic Training

John Walker, aka the Super-Patriot, has been selected as the new Captain America, after Steve Rogers resigned from the position.[1] In order to learn how to fight like the original Captain America, John has been given every piece of archive footage of the original in action.[2] Although John is confident he will be able to mimic the original’s fighting style, he is less confident about mastering his shield throwing skills. Monitoring his progress is Val Cooper, who reports to her superiors — General Leiws Haywerth and Douglas Rockwell — that the Freedom Force are not cutting it as training partners. They assure her that they have found someone who will help them train the new Captain America. After they leave, Val Cooper gets a call from John’s former agent, Ethan Thurm, much to her aggravation, because her number is private.

Meanwhile, John catches up with his pal Lemar Hoskins, one of the only members of his old crew to be hired along with John for this Captain America gig. Lemar has been outfitted as the new Bucky and is being run through remedial English to improve his manner of speaking on top of his training. John then goes to his shield throwing training. Unfortunately, no matter how hard he tries, he can’t master ricocheting his shield properly and ends up damaging the training dummies instead of disarming them.

At lunch time, John and Lemar go down to the cafeteria where Lemar is mocked by the members of the Freedom Force. Hoskins wants a fight, but John calms him down. Their meal is interrupted by Val Cooper who comes to express her displeasure about Ethan Thurm getting her private number. John is annoyed by this because he never gave out Val’s number and vows to do something about Ethan before he can screw things up for him and Lemar.

During their next training session, John and Lemar are working together to defeat a group of soldiers in Guardsmen armor. The test is a failure as well because John still can’t properly throw his shield, leaving him vulnerable to attack when it doesn’t bounce back into his hands. However, this sparring session gives John some inspiration on how they can deal with Ethan Thurm. The pair sneak out to meet with Ethan at a local bar. There, Ethan threatens to go to the media and reveal the Super-Patriot’s shadier activities unless he is paid off for his silence.[3] John and Lamar are then told that they have until noon that Friday to give Ethan what he wants.

The following day, as John and Lemar are heading into more training, they pass by the room where the Guardsmen armor is being kept. This gives John and idea on how to deal with Ethan. Moments later, John goes into a training session with the Taskmaster, whose photographic reflexes have made him a master in the shield throwing techniques perfected by the original Captain America.[4] Under Taskmaster’s rigorous training exercise, John slowly begins to master Captain America’s shield throwing technique.

That evening, John makes arrangements to meet with Ethan Thurm, who is waiting for them at the same bar with Hector Lennox and Jerome Johnson, two other former members of the Buckies. Rather than appearing in person, John and Lamar storm the bear wearing Guardsmen armor. The combination of the armor and their superhuman strength, John and Lemar are easily able to incapacitate Hector and Jerome — whose strength is also augmented. They then threaten Ethan, telling him that if he speaks to the media he will be deemed a national security threat and dealt with harshly. Afraid for his life, Ethan promises to backdown, and John and Lamar flee the scene.

Although they hoped to keep this rendezvous a secret, word eventually gets back to Val Cooper who confronts John about the incident the next morning. Rather than deny any involvement, John admits to the whole thing, deciding that if he is to be the next Captain America he’s going to have to be transparent to his handlers.

Recurring Characters

Captain America, Bucky, Ethan Thurm, Hector Lennox, Jerome Johnson, The Commission (Valerie Cooper, Lewis Haywerth, Douglas Rockwell), Taskmaster, Freedom Force (Mystique, Avalanche, Blob, Destiny, Pyro), Guardsmen

Continuity Notes

  1. The government ordered Steve to become a government agent in Captain America #332. He declined and returned his costume and shield. John will carry the Captain America mantle until issue #350.

  2. Most of the footage seen here are genetic battles with Captain America and regular crooks. One in particular does stand out here: A scene of Captain America fighting the Scorpion. This is likely from the time the pair fought in Captain America #122.

  3. In order to boost Super-Patriot’s popularity, Ethan Thurm engaged in a smear campaign against Captain America by illegal means. Namely, he set up the Buckies (of which Lemar was a member) to act as Captain America’s loyal followers. They then staged an attack on Super-Patriot in Captain America #323 and later assaulted some foreign exchange students at the University of Wisconsin in Captain America #327.

  4. The Taskmaster is assisting here for a lesser sentence following his captured in Thing #32. Here, Taskmaster — aka Tony Masters — states that he was born with his “photographic reflexes”. However, this is not true. As revealed in Taskmaster (vol. 2) #3-4, Tony was once a SHIELD agent. While on a mission he injected himself with a Nazi super-soldier serum derivative to save his own life. This gave him his abilities, however every time they were used it caused him to forget something about his past. These memory problems were used to secretly use the Taskmaster as a double agent for SHIELD. His progressive memory loss made him forget about the incident that give him his powers and he began to believe that he had them since birth.

Topical References

  • Ethan Thurm demands a million dollars to keep silent about the Super-Patriot’s shadier activities. Adjusting for inflation with would be about 2.4 million in 2021 money.

Captain America #333

Captain America #333

Captain America #335

Captain America #335