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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Dark Avengers #7

Dark Avengers #7

Utopia, Part 3

This story continues from X-Men: Legacy #226….

Professor Charles Xavier and the Beast (Hank McCoy) are prisoners at Alcatraz Island, the western headquarters of HAMMER. Hank feels terrible as his body has begun shedding fur and his feline-like finger nails. Xavier reaches out to his former student telepathically and promises he will find a way out for them. Hank, unfortunately, isn’t sure he can believe that this is actually Charles and not some kind of further torture.[1]

This is the work of the Omega Machine, created by a variant of Hank from another reality.[2] This so-called Dark Beast is showing the results of the device to the Iron Patriot (Norman Osborn). Osborn is furious that McCoy’s machine doesn’t negate mutant powers harmlessly, per his specifications. This insults the Dark Beast, but Norman warns him that if he doesn’t fix the problem, he’ll be subjected to the Omega Machine next. Norman then heads back to his situation room where the Sentry (Bob Reynolds) is watching the situation in San Francisco unfold on various screens. Osborn tells him that the world has gone crazy, which visibly upsets the Sentry. However, Norman tells Bob to trust in him and that Emma Frost completes her task for them.

At that moment, Norman Osborn’s Dark X-Men — the Black Queen (Emma Frost), Wolverine (actually his son Daken), the Sub-Mariner (Namor), Cloak (Tyrone Johnson), Dagger (Tandy Bowen), Mimic (Calvin Rankin),[3] and Weapon Omega (Michael Pointer) — are currently dealing with mutant rioters in Union Square. Among the rioters are Adam-X, Avalanche, Hellion, Lorelei, Match, Meld, and Sunspot. They take issue with mutants working for Norman Osborn, with Hellion going so far as to call them outright Nazis. Wolverine tries to use lethal force, but Emma reminds him that they are to contain the riot, not kill the participants. Eventually, the Dark X-Men defeat all the rioters.

Meanwhile, back on Alcatraz, Cyclops (Scott Summers), leader of the X-Men, arrives via jetpack. He is greeted by HAMMER guards with their weapons drawn and he says he has come to speak to their leader. That’s when Norman’s second-in-command, Victoria Hand, arrives and says Summers is being foolish for coming unannounced. Osborn follows her and tells her and his men to stand down. When he reaches out to shake Cyclops’ hand, Scott crosses his arm instead. Norman then tries to relate with Scott by saying he understand the plight of mutants. However, Cyclops cuts through his speech by simply asking that he and his forces surrender. This stuns Osborn to silence and Summers goes on to explain that if HAMMER withdraws from San Francisco he will get things back under control. True to form, Norman refuses to do any such thing. Cyclops warns Osborn that he tried and flies off. Watching him go, Norman promises Victoria that when Cyclops is dead he’ll be the first person to throw dirt on his grave.

Inside, the rest of Norman’s Dark Avengers watch the unfolding situation on TV. Hawkeye (actually the assassin Bullseye in disguise) complains that these Dark X-Men are unnecessary because they were doing fine on their own.[4] Ms, Marvel (aka Karla Sofen, aka Moonstone) is of the position that a mutant problem needs to be solved by mutants. Mac Gargan (aka Venom, who is posing as Spider-Man) is just going to follow orders, even if it means being bored. This does little to quell Bullseye who gets upset seeing Daken out having all the fun. He then asks Ares if he wants to go out and do something, and the Olympian god of war agrees to accompany him. That’s when the Sentry enters the room and informs them that the Dark X-Men have returned from their mission with their prisoners.

However, Emma Frost is very upset with Wolverine’s rough treatment of the prisoners and confronts him about it. They are about to come to blows when Osborn (clad in his Iron Patriot armor) breaks the two of them up. Emma tells Norman that while the mutants they have captured have broken the law, they still have rights and she won’t sit by and watch them violated. They are arguing this as the prisoners are being fitted with power inhibitors and Norman admits the optics look bad but insists that the Beast’s power dampeners do not cause any pain. Frost refuses to believe it on his word alone because she knows that the Hank McCoy working for him is his evil variant from another reality and demands to be shown proof. After a moment’s consideration, Norman agrees to show her the Omega Machine in use. As the pair leaves the room, Emma orders her team to behave themselves.

However, moments after they are gone, Bullseye begins giving Daken grief for working on another team. This heated exchange leads to both teams to start fighting among one another.

Meanwhile, Emma is taken to the holding cells and is shown Erg, one of the previously arrested mutants. Osborn and McCoy assure her that the power dampening Omega Machine doesn’t cause anything but slight lethargy to those affected by it. While Osborn is making this bold claim, Professor X is able to reach out to Emma with his mind. Although she can’t respond back while in her diamond form, Charles informs her that Osborn is lying to her and that she should demand to see the other Hank McCoy — the Beast from their own reality — as this will prove it. When Frost asks to see McCoy, Norman denies having him in custody. Xavier insists that Hank is in the cell next to him. When Emma demands to know who is in the pair of cells in front of her, she is told that they are empty. When she looks inside, all she sees is equipment storage. However, this is a hologram and Charles tells Emma that she is looking directly at him. Verbally responding to Charles, but acting as though she is responding to Norman, Emma tells Xavier that she believes him and that everything is going to work out.

However, as though in opposition of those words, Simon Trask, the leader of the Humanity Now! Coalition, speaks out to his followers. He tells them that while Norman Osborn has deployed his own team of X-Men, mutants he claims are good, this goes in the face of their beliefs. He tells his fellow Bio-Sentinels that the only good mutants are dead ones and that it is now time to act!

… This story continues in Uncanny X-Men #514.

Recurring Characters

Dark Avengers (Iron Patriot, Ms. Marvel, Hawkeye, Spider-Man, Ares, Sentry), Dark X-Men (Black Queen, Wolverine, Cloak, Dagger, Dark Beast, Mimic, Sub-Mariner, Weapon Omega), HAMMER (Victoria Hand), Adam-X, Avalanche, Hellion, Lorelei, Match, Meld, Sunspot, Humanity Now! (Simon Trask, Bio-Sentinels), Professor X, Cyclops, Beast, Erg

Continuity Notes

  1. Xavier was apprehended by Norman Osborn in X-Men: Legacy #225, while the Beast was arrested in Dark Avengers/Uncanny X-Men: Utopia #1.

  2. The Dark Beast comes from the Age of Apocalypse reality. He fled to Reality-616 in X-Men: Omega #1 and has lived there ever since. Per Exiles #84, this timeline has been designated Reality-295.

  3. Some of the Dark X-Men’s status as mutants are complicated. Allow me to explain:

    • For Mimic, it was long believed that Calvin’s powers derived from one of his father’s science experiments, as seen in X-Men #19. However, it will later be confirmed in House of X #5 that Rankin is absolutely a mutant.

    • The idea that Cloak and Dagger were mutants was first posited in Marvel Team-Up Annual #6/New Mutants #23-24. Over the years since there have been conflicting claims. Without getting into the weeds too much, it was later and definitively concluded in Cloak and Dagger (vol. 4) #1 that they were not mutants.

  4. The Dark Avengers started off with an active hand in trying to contain the mutant riots in San Fran, as seen in Dark Avengers/Uncanny X-Men: Utopia #1 and Uncanny X-Men #513.

Utopia Reading Order

Dark X-Men: The Beginning #1-3, Dark X-Men: The Confession #1, Dark Avengers/Uncanny X-Men: Utopia #1, Uncanny X-Men #513, X-Men: Legacy #226, Dark Avengers #7, Uncanny X-Men #514, X-Men: Legacy #227, Dark Avengers #8, Dark Avengers/Uncanny X-Men: Exodus #1

Dark Avengers #6

Dark Avengers #6

Dark Avengers #8

Dark Avengers #8