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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Dark Avengers #9

Dark Avengers #9

On the line with the Secretary of State, Victoria Hand goes looking for her boss, Norman Osborn. He has once again locked himself up inside Tony Stark’s Iron Man vault in Avengers Tower. When she knocks she gets no answer and leaves, telling the Secretary that Osborn is off on a mission. Moments after she is gone, Osborn finally speaks, pleading for help but finds that there is nobody there.[1]

Meanwhile, Ares has returned to his apartment in the Bronx to find his son Alex Aaron sleeping in bed. He tells the boy it is time to wake up and get ready for school. As Alex sits down to breakfast he watches the news. The top story is about the Dark Avengers recent clash with the X-Men in San Francisco.[2] Ares tells his son that he and his comrades bested the mutants in battle. When the boy asks his father if he did the right thing. Ares assures him that is was the right thing, saying that he is older and wiser than his son. However, Alex isn’t so sure, saying the media has suggested that his boss, Norman Osborn, is some kind of monster. This angers Ares, who puts his foot down on the subject, making the boy silent.[3] He then tells the boy to finish up as he is running late for school and leaves.

Moments after Ares is gone, Alex gets a page informing him that his fellow Secret Warrior, Daisy Johnson (aka Quake), is waiting for him outside. He hops on her scooter and they ride off, unaware that Ares was spying on them from the distance and is now following them.[4] As they ride to one of Nick Fury’s safe houses, Alex asks Daisy if she has heard the news of what was going on in San Francisco. She has, but when he asks what they are going to do about it, she tells him that they’ll have to wait and see.

When they arrive at the safehouse in Soho, they and the rest of Fury’s Secret Warriors — (Sebastian) Druid, Hellfire (J.T. James), Slingshot (Elena Rodriguez), Stonewall (Jerry Sledge), and Eden Fesi — are disappointed to learn that they are going to spend the day studying the history of Advanced Idea Mechanics (AIM). Fury tells them that this information is important and could one day save their lives in the field.[5]

That’s when the alarm goes off, alerting them that Ares followed Alex to the safehouse. As the Secret Warriors prepare for a fight, Ares forces his way into the non-descript barbershop and smashes his way into the bunker below ground.[6] Hellfire tries to attack Ares and is quickly knocked out. Fury orders everyone to stand down and asks for some privacy so he, Alex, and Ares can talk things out.

Ares is informed about how Alex has been recruited by Fury due to his ability to tap into fear and is being trained by spymaster to combat the forces of evil. Surprisingly, Ares bows his head in shame and admits that he doesn’t know how to raise his son. This is because all he knows is himself and his father before him. He was pushed out by Zeus and had to find his own way and is upset to learn that his own son is doing something very similar. He now doesn’t know what to do. Nick tells Ares that he has been at this game long enough not to tell an immortal what they should do and leaves it up to him. Ares asks Alex if this is the path he has chosen for himself. When the boy agrees that this is true, he decides to let Alex continue working under Fury. But he warns Nick that should Alex die on his watch, he will bring down the wrath of Zeus himself and spend eternity burning in Hades.

As Ares leaves, Fury also warns him that Norman Osborn is bad news and that he will eventually fall from grace. Ares, disagrees, saying that he has done Nick Fury’s old job very well.[7] Fury disagrees, but Ares leaves without saying another word. After that, Fury calls the Secret Warriors back into the room and tells them to pack things up as they are bugging out to avoid getting caught. Even though Ares will keep their location a secret, Fury can’t be sure Osborn won’t find out through other means.

Back at Avengers Tower, the Dark Avengers — Ms. Marvel (Karla Sofen, formerly Moonstone), Hawkeye (actually the assassin Bullseye in disguise), Spider-Man (Mac Gargan and the Venom symbiote posing as the wall-crawler), Wolverine (actually his son Daken), and Victoria Hand are shooting the shit.[8] That’s when they notice the Sentry (Bob Reynolds) returning to his Watchtower on the roof of the building. When they ask what’s going on with “captain crazy”, Victoria assures them that they have Bob under control. However, upstairs, Reynolds is looking for his wife when she suddenly ambushes him by a weapon left behind by Noh-Varr.[9][10] She then shoots the Sentry in the face, seemingly killing him. The shot is heard downstairs, but is dismisses as nothing. Meanwhile, in the vault, Norman Osborn still sits in isolation when an alarm starts to beep.

Recurring Characters

Dark Avengers (Iron Patriot (voice only), Ms. Marvel, Hawkeye, Spider-Man, Wolverine, Ares, Sentry), Victoria Hand, Secret Warriors (Nick Fury, Quake, Druid, Hellfire, Phobos, Slingshot, Stonewall, Eden Fesi), Lindy Lee, CLOC

Continuity Notes

  1. Per Amazing Spider-Man #40, Osborn has been batshit crazy after his original Goblin Formula blew up in his face. He has been mostly lucid since Thunderbolts #110 after undergoing treatment. However, as seen in Dark Avengers #6, we have seen that Osborn has been struggling with his sanity again. In Siege: Prologue #1, we will learn that he is being gaslit by Loki to manipulate him into attacking Asgard.

  2. This happened during the Utopia event. See Dark X-Men: The Beginning #1-3, Dark X-Men: The Confession #1, Dark Avengers/Uncanny X-Men: Utopia #1, Uncanny X-Men #513, X-Men: Legacy #226, Dark Avengers #7, Uncanny X-Men #514, X-Men: Legacy #227, Dark Avengers #8, and Dark Avengers/Uncanny X-Men: Exodus #1 for the whole story.

  3. When Alex suggests that Osborn is a monster, Ares laughs and says he should meet his grandfather. He is referring to Zeus who, at the time of this story, Ares believed to be dead as seen in Ares #1-5. However, around the time of this story, Zeus has just been resurrected by Hercules, as seen in Incredible Hercules #131. Ares won’t learn this until Incredible Hercules #138.

  4. Ares discovered that his son Alex has been disappearing off somewhere in Dark Avengers #5. What he didn’t know was that he was recruited into the Secret Warriors in Mighty Avengers #13.

  5. Here, Fury states that AIM has had an on-again-off-again relationship with Hydra. Per Strange Tales #146-149, AIM started off as the science division of Hydra. They began operating independently starting in Tales of Suspense #92 but have worked with Hydra many times since.

  6. One of SHIELD’s most iconic hideouts in Manhattan was hidden under a barbershop, as seen for the first time in Strange Tales #136.

  7. Nick Fury was the long time director of SHIELD, starting in Strange Tales #135. In recent times, Fury went AWOL after it was discovered that he launched an illegal coup in Latveria, as seen in Secret War #1-5. Osborn took over as head of National Security and reorganized SHIELD as HAMMER starting in Secret Invasion #8. This will remain the status quo until Siege #4.

  8. Daken boasts about the time he cut off Deadpool’s hand. That was in Wolverine: Origins #24.

  9. Noh-Varr was a short lived member of Norman’s Avengers, joining in Dark Avengers #1. He left in issue #6 and his subsequent fate will be revealed in Dark Avengers Annual #1.

  10. Lindy is frightened by her husband due to his long history of mental health problems. See Sentry/The Void #1, New Avengers #7-10, and Sentry (vol. 2) #1-8. The Sentry isn’t killed here as we see next issue.

Dark Avengers #8

Dark Avengers #8

Dark Avengers #10

Dark Avengers #10