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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Journey into Mystery #509

Journey into Mystery #509

Howie’s Tale

The Lost Gods have ventured into the realm of Seth, the Egyptian god of death in order to rescue Wad, aka Odin.[1] In the ensuing battle with Seth’s minions, Howie Barker has been separated from the rest of his friends and is now searching for them in a panic. Since he is fleeing on a pair of inline skates, Howie easily trips and giving into the panic curls up into the fetal position thinking he is going to die alone.

Elsewhere, the rest of the Lost Gods have just noticed that Howie had gone missing in the battle. They also need to figure out where the boy went as quickly as possible because Red Norvell — now a loyal servant to Seth — is making short work of the Ice Giants known as Mroht and Pyllar.[2] Both Tso Zhung and the Enchantress dismiss Howie as dead and suggest that they flee while they can. Ericka and the others disagree, prompting Amora and Tso to leave without them. However, when the sorceress attempts to cast a teleportation spell, she discovers that something is now blocking her magicks. While in Seth’s castle, the death god is entertaining himself by torturing his prisoners, Wad and Pietro Vizarri. He takes pleasure in their agony and can’t wait for what he has in store for the Lost Gods.

Back on Earth, Freddie Moyer paces around Ericka’s apartment, anxious to know what’s going on in Seth’s domain. Freda Barker tells him to stop pacing as it is accomplishing nothing. She turns on her TV to try and take her mind off the fact that her nephew ran off to fight Seth and puts it on the Gargantuan Gourmet, a popular cooking show. Freddie then reveals to her that the host of that program, Vincent Starwit is one of them, but he refused to join the fight out of fear for his family’s safety. That’s when Freda notices that the episode they are watching is a rerun and wonders where Vincent has gone.

Little do they know that Vincent and his wife Gerty have taken an impromptu vacation to Bryce National Park in Utah with their family. As he is signing an autograph for a park ranger, the Starwit family are told how the park has been getting a lot of visitors lately who have been drawn to a nearby limestone structure dubbed “Thor’s Hammer”. Hearing this comes a shock to Vincent and his wife.[3][4]

While in the realm of the death, Howie Barker is still cowering on the ground. Trying to muster up his lost bravery, he reminds himself how he was an outcast in high school. To make up for his lack of friends, he lost himself in fantasy books and always dreamed of becoming an epic hero, just like in his favorite stories. He now believes he doesn’t have what it takes, but still tries to make an effort to get off the ground and get moving again.

Meanwhile, the other Lost Gods are making their way to Seth’s castle when they are ambushed by Red Norvell. When the Enchantress attempts to cast a spell, her hands are restrained by a counter-spell. This turns out to be the work of Amora’s sister, Lorelei, who has also been resurrected by Seth to do his bidding, something she will enjoy doing as she blames the Enchantress for her death.[5] In the ensuing battle, Tso Zhung is once more convinced that they are fighting a losing battle. He then drops his battle mace and flees the scene. The others are not faring very well as their foes are far too powerful.

Hearing the sound of battle over the ridge, Howie tries to force himself to get back up. However, when a spear lands next to his head he is frightened all over again. Considering himself a coward, Barker pulls off the headband that gives him his super-speed and tosses it away.

Over the ridge, Tyrone Hammer sees Tso’s battle mace on the ground and races for it. when he picks it up in his hands he can feel it boosting his strength and lunges into battle. Despite this recent development, the Lost Gods ultimately fall when Lorelei grows tired of the battle and unleashes a powerful mystical burst that knocks them all out. Seeing his friends being taken prisoner, Howie Barker realizes that he can wuss out now and recovers his headband and begins planning a daring rescue mission.

While inside Seth’s palace, Tso Zhung has once more come to the death god to propose an alliance. This amuses Seth who decides to take Zhung up on his offer, however decides that his mortal form is of no use to him. Seth then uses his magic to restore Tso to his true Asgardian form, that of the trickster god Loki!

Recurring Characters

Howie Barker, Ericka Velez, Donald Velez, Barry Landers, Tyrone Hammer, Wad, Pietro Vizarri, Freddie Moyer, Freda Barker, Vincent Starwit, Gerty Starwit, Loki, Ulik, the Enchantress, Seth, Red Norvell, Lorelei, Mroht, Pyllar

Continuity Notes

  1. Lots going on off the top, here’s what you need to know:

    • When the WorldEngine faked Ragnarok, it caused Yggdrasil to banish the Asgardians to Earth in mortal forms with no memories of their past, as per Thor #491-494 and Journey into Mystery #511. Odin has been trying to track down and revive his people since issue #503.

    • In issue #506 it was revealed that the construction of the WorldEngine, originally built by a madman named Price, was actually facilitated by Seth the Egyptian death god who wishes to extinguish all live in the universe.

    • In issue #507, Seth managed to capture Wad and Pietro Vizarri. Our heroes ten ventured into Seth’s domain last issue.

    • Might as well explain who’s who while I have you here: Ericka, Freda, Howie, Tso, Tyron, Donald, Barry, Freddie, Wad, and Pietro are actually Sif, Frigga, Hermod, Loki, Hogun, Heimdall, Balder, Fandral, Odin, and the Grand Vizier respectively. Odin’s true identity has been known since Thor #497, Tso’s identity will be revealed in Journey into Mystery #509, the Grand Viziers in issue #511, and everyone else’s will be revealed in issue #512.

  2. Red was murdered by Seth’s minions in issue #504. However, he was resurrected and made loyal to Seth last issue.

  3. As revealed in issue #512: Vincent and his wife are actually Volstagg and Hildegund. Although its never specified during this run, presumably the Starwit children are also Volstagg and Hildegund’s Asgardian children. Seven children are depicted out of the eleven that the couple are on record as having. Which children they might be has yet to be specified. Where the missing children (be it off panel, or someplace else) is also not been detailed.

  4. Thor’s Hammer is the place where Odin has hidden the power that is needed to restore the Asgardians to normal, as we’ll see in issue #512. The people who have been drawn to Bryce Canyon are other Asgardians trapped in mortal form.

  5. Lorelei was injured during a war between Seth and Asgard in Thor #398-400. Ultimately, she ended up dying due to her injuries in Thor #402. Lorelei’s spirit ended up in Hel, which is where she was last seen circa Thor #488.

Topical References

  • Ericka’s apartment is depicted as having a CRT television. This should be considered a topical reference as this is an obsolete technology.

Journey into Mystery #508

Journey into Mystery #508

Journey into Mystery #510

Journey into Mystery #510