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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #19

Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #19

Denial

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This story continues from Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #1….

Unaware that she is being secretly watched by Morlun, Mary Jane Watson is reading the latest editorial about Spider-Man by J. Jonah Jameson. In it, Jonah is accusing Spider-Man of an unprovoked attack. Mary Jane can hardly believe this and crumples up the paper before being called to stage for her performance.[1] As she heads for the stage, Mary Jane thinks back to an earlier moment…

… Mary Jane is playing pool with Steve Rogers, aka Captain America, and takes the opportunity to ask him some questions about her husband.[2] She tries to explain how she feels and compares her life to the character Aldonza in the play “Man of La Mancha” who doesn’t understand why Don Quixote — the hero of the story — travels around the country looking for wrongs to correct. Steve things he understands what she means, why does Spider-Man — and the other New Avengers — risk their lives when nobody asked them to do so. Steve isn’t entirely certain but thinks that it might be a calling to serve a higher purpose. When he compares what they do to nuns and priests, Mary Jane asks if they are doing what they do because they think God told them so. However, this isn’t exactly what Steve means either. Before he can explain himself further, Spider-Man arrives and jokingly accuses Steve of making time with his wife. However, he overheard what they were saying and suggests that Mary Jane could be doing a lot worse, but instead she stays with him in Stark Towers. Before Mary Jane can get him to explain himself further, Peter puts on his Spider-Man mask and swings out the window.

… As Mary Jane finishes her recollection the play is over and she and the other cast members notice that the same fan, a guy named Johnny, has come to see the play for the 15th time. Later, in the dressing room, the other actors ask if the man causes Mary Jane stress, but she says it takes a lot to stress her out. That’s when another actor races into the dressing room and tells the women to check out the Spider-Man that’s happening on television, saying that the web-slinger is going to get himself killed. Mary Jane rushes into the other room and tries to see what’s going on, but the battle between Spider-Man and the Tracer is being blocked by other cast members. Mary Jane becomes upset when some of the crew begin placing bets on the outcome of the battle. Growing more upset and unable to see what’s happening on TV and decides to go out to the scene of the battle herself. Outside, a group of fans is waiting outside, and one of them asks for an autograph. In a hurry, Mary Jane declines and walks away. When the man denied an autograph begins speaking negatively about her, Johnny tries to start a fight. He’s stopped by Morlun who points out which way Mary Jane went, implying that the obsessed fan should follow her.

Mary Jane goes down the street to a nearby bar where he bribes the bartender and a few patrons with free drinks if they change the channel from the baseball game to the news coverage of Spider-Man’s battle with Tracer. As the battle rages, Mary Jane is concerned until there are reports of Iron Man arriving on the scene. This quickly changes to horror when, suddenly, Iron Man begins attacking Spider-Man instead of helping him stop Tracer. Somehow, Tracer has taken control of Iron Man’s armor, and he apologizes to Spider-Man as he struggles to try and stop his armor from attacking the wall-crawler. Spider-Man struggles to break free, due to the mystery illness that appears to be slowly killing him. [3] Unfortunately for Mary Jane, the news coverage stops when police helicopters arrive on the scene, forcing the news cameras away. As she prepares to leave, Johnny enters the bar and offers to buy her a drink. Mary Jane is flattered that Johnny likes her play but declines his offer and says she needs to go. That’s when Johnny grabs her arm hard enough that it hurts and demands that she stay. When the bartender tells him to let Mary Jane go, Johnny pulls out a gun and fires a bullet past his ear and insists that they should all sit down and have a drink.

However, he let Mary Jane go in the process and while Johnny is distracted, she grabs a pool cue and beats him into submission. That’s when news coverage of the Spider-Man battle continues and they are told that Tracer’s hover-craft has crashed. However, there is no word as to what happened to Spider-Man. Since nobody really knows, Mary Jane runs outside and flags down a cab. The only reason the taxi stops is because Morlun steps in front of it. When the driver says he’s on duty, Morlun whispers to him about how he came back from the dead to kill Spider-Man, the hack decides to let Mary Jane in after all.[4] Mary Jane thanks Morlun, unaware that she is speaking to one of Spider-Man’s most deadly foes, and calls him a lifesaver. Watching the taxi drive away, Morlun is amused because nobody ever called him that before.

When Mary Jane gets back to Stark Tower, she discovers that her husband is already home and begins asking him about his day. When he glosses over his battle with Tracer, Mary Jane starts giving him the third degree. When he asks what’s wrong, Mary Jane explains that its hard knowing that he is Spider-Man because there was never anybody she could talk to about the things she has to endure while he goes out in costume.[5] She figured that it would have changed now that they were living in Stark Tower with the rest of the New Avengers, but unfortunately, it has not.[6] She then asks if Tony Stark is okay after the battle. Peter says Tracer somehow took control of Tony’s Iron Man armor but is basically okay. That’s when Mary Jane points out how sloppy Spider-Man was out there, almost as though he was trying to die in battle. Peter ignores this observation, reminding her why he goes out as Spider-Man. Mary Jane understands perfectly, that Peter is still suffering from survival guilt after the burglar murdered Uncle Ben.[7] Beginning to cry, Mary Jane points out that Peter once said he always seems to catch himself out of web-fluid back in the day and wonders why he never put some kind of gauge on his web-shooters. Now, however, she thinks she knows why. In fact, over the years she thinks at Peter has become more and more sloppy as Spider-Man because he’d rather be dead with his Uncle than alive with his wife and she doesn’t know how to live with that.

Peter denies this, saying that he doesn’t want to die. He then shows her the doctor’s report that states that he is going to die and tells her that he wants to live and he has never been so scared in his life. After reading the report, Mary Jane drops it on the ground and hugs her husband.

This story is continued in Amazing Spider-Man #525….

Recurring Characters

Spider-Man, Morlun, Tracer, Mary Jane Watson, Captain America, Iron Man

Continuity Notes

1. Spider-Man accidentally attacked a limo carrying J. Jonah Jameson in Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #1.

2. At the time of this story, Peter and Mary Jane are referred to as husband and wife here. However, not long after this story, their marriage is erased from existence by Mephisto in Amazing Spider-Man #545. As such they should be considered a common-law couple here.

3. This mystery illness was first identified in Amazing Spider-Man #524, although Peter has been hiding how serious it is from everybody.

4. Morlun seemingly perished during his fight with Spider-Man in Amazing Spider-Man (vol. 2) #30-35. It’s later explained in Scarlet Spiders #1-3, that Morlun (and his family) have cloned bodies made for them in the event that one of them dies, their mind is transferred into a clone body.

5. Mary Jane mentions how she found out that Peter Parker was Spider-Man. As explained in Marvel Graphic Novel #46, Mary Jane discovered that Peter Parker was Spider-Man on the night he went to catch Uncle Ben’s murderer (circa Amazing Fantasy #15). However, she wouldn’t tell Peter she knew the truth until Amazing Spider-Man #257.

6. Peter, Mary Jane, and Aunt May all moved into Stark Tower after Charlie Weiderman destroyed their apartment and Aunt May’s home in Amazing Spider-Man #518.

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7. Amazing Fantasy #15.

Topical References

  • Mary Jane states that she is copying the moves Tom Cruise made playing pool in the movie Color of Money.

  • One of the actors in Mary Jane’s play hopes that the thing they need to see on TV isn’t a trailer for the new Harry Potter film. This is topical since every Harry Potter book has since been adapted into a film, the last one came out in 2011.

  • The crew is watching the Spider-Man battle on an old CRT television. These types of TVs are obsolete.

  • The patrons at the bar are watching a Yankees game. When they change the channel, one of them curses Steinbrenner. This would be George Steinbrenner, who owned the New York Yankees from 1973 to 2010.

Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #18

Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #18

Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #20

Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #20