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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Marvel Team-Up #105

Marvel Team-Up #105

A Small Circle of Hate!

One night, Luke Cage and Dan Rand are flying in attorney Jeryn Hogarth's twin-engined airplane over the southwestern United States, looking for a pair of thieves. Instead of finding the criminals, however, they find the Hulk. When he sees their plane in the starlight, he leaps toward it and shatters a wing with a punch. Carole, the pilot, manages to keep the craft somewhat under control, and she levels it off just as it crash-lands in the desert. Fortunately, neither Luke, Dan, nor Carole is injured, although Dan is knocked unconscious. When Luke finds the door jammed shut, he tears the plane open with his bare hands. After Carole gets safely out of the plane, he lays Dan on the sand. Unknown to the pilot and passengers, the crash was observed by a clan of indigents living nearby. The patriarch, "Paw," remarks that the plane could be carrying much-needed water that those aboard might be willing to share. If no one remains alive, he adds, they can take all the water. His daughter, Patty, says that she heard on the radio that the Army is looking for the Hulk in the area. But Paw does not care because they need the water to survive. The family approaches the crash site just as Cage is heaving the airplane around. Paw immediately assumes that Cage is the Hulk, but Paw's son, Luther, thinks differently.

To prove it, Paw fires his rifle at Cage and notes how the bullets bounce harmlessly off. Cage explains that although he does have steel-hard skin, he is not the Hulk, and he tries to persuade Paw to help get him and his companions out of the desert. Then Paw aims his rifle at Carole. "Hulk" may be bulletproof, he says, but the woman is not. And so, leaving Dan unconscious on the sand, Paw and his family take Luke and Carole away at gunpoint. After a lengthy march, the company approaches a large pile of boulders. Paw explains that a rockslide has buried their only well, and he wants Luke to use his strength to dig it out. Then he will be free to go. Luke surveys the site and sees that the smaller rocks will be no problem, but the large boulder in the middle will be impossible to move, even for him. Meanwhile, Dan revives with a splitting headache. Because his clothes are ruined, he puts on his costume, and then he starts to meditate to relieve the pain. After a while, he becomes aware of a shadow looming over him. At first, he thinks his partner has returned, but then he sees that it is the Hulk. The green-skinned giant says that he thought the plane carried soldiers, but now he can see that the plane carried only the "fist-man." When the Hulk attacks, Iron Fist tries to defend himself, but his martial-arts skills are nearly useless. The best he can do is evade the Hulk's powerful blows.

Then, during a lull in the battle, Iron Fist concentrates his chi into his fist, causing it to glow with energy. This has an unexpected result: The glow mesmerizes the Hulk into changing into Bruce Banner. Iron Fist quickly tells Banner what happened, and soon they set off to find Luke Cage. Luke must have somehow been forced to leave, says Iron Fist, because he would never have left him alone otherwise. It does not take Luke long to remove the smaller rocks from the wellspring, but as he imagined, the large rock proves intractable. As he sits down to rest, Patty brings him a cup of her family's precious water. She still thinks he is the Hulk, but he explains that his name is Luke. She apologizes for the way her father treated him and explains that he treats everyone the same, even his own family. Luke thinks to himself that a girl her age should be having fun, not eking out a living in the middle of nowhere. Patty asks why he keeps looking away from her. He replies that he is worried about the man they left behind. That man, accompanied by Bruce Banner, has tracked Luke, Carole, and the family through the wasteland and now approaches from the other side of a low ridge. Iron Fist tells Banner that he learned his tracking skills in a city called K'un-Lun. Suddenly they hear voices, and when they peer over the ridge's edge, they see Paw strike Luke with a club for "stealing" their water. From their shouting, Banner learns that they think Luke is the Hulk. It's a circle of hate, he says: They hate the Hulk, and the Hulk hates back. Banner becomes increasingly agitated, and seconds later he changes uncontrollably into the Hulk. Because Paw still believes Cage is the Hulk, the Hulk imagines that Paw is attacking him, so he shatters a boulder and charges toward the family.

Iron Fist and Cage try to distract him, and in the ensuing battle, many rocks are smashed as the crimefighters dodge the Hulk's fists. Then it occurs to Cage to lure the Hulk toward the rock that covers the family's well. Iron Fist soon sees that Cage is trying to get the Hulk to do something, but he does not know exactly what. He tries to help, but Cage just thinks Iron Fist is needlessly exposing himself to danger. Despite the confusion, they eventually do manage to get the Hulk to shatter the boulder that was too large for Cage to move, and the Hulk is suddenly soaked by the water that gushes forth. The Hulk shouts in rage, and when he overhears Paw asking Luther to hand him his gun, he remembers that Paw was the one who tried to hurt him- But before he can do anything, a group of Army helicopters arrives, drawn by the sound of his voice. As dawn begins to break, the Hulk faces his new attackers. Paw aims his rifle at him, but when Patty tries to grab it, he slaps her aside. Angered by this rough treatment, the Hulk starts to attack Paw, but Cage knocks Paw out and tells the Hulk that the old man cannot hurt anyone anymore. By then the soldiers have emerged from the helicopters to surround the Hulk. Weary of battle, the Hulk simply bounds away. Then Patty thanks Luke for his help and asks him to take her away with him. She has never seen a city before, she pleads. At first, Luke declines, but he soon relents, and he, she, Iron Fist, and Carole depart aboard one of the helicopters.

Recurring Characters

Hulk, Heroes for Hire (Power Man, Iron Fist)

Continuity Notes

Wolves in Designer's Clothing

Luke Cage and Danny Rand are back in New York where they've taken on a job as 'runway escorts' to a group of fashion models. While Misty Knight and Colleen Wing watch from the front row with young Patty, the models suddenly pull guns out of their purses and demand all the valuables from the audience! The Heroes for Hire and Daughters of the Dragon leap into action, subduing the false models and confiscating their weapons. But one of the girls has slipped unnoticed into the crowd and made a grab for Patty, to serve as a hostage. She orders the heroes to surrender, but does not see, nor expect, Patty landing a sudden blow to head with moves she learned from watching Misty in the training room. The gang is rounded up and Danny remarks how worried he was about the culture shock to Patty when they brought her to the city. Misty replies that Patty is going to get along just fine.

Recurring Characters

Heroes for Hire (Power Man, Iron Fist), Daughters of the Dragon (Misty Knight, Colleen Wing)

Marvel Team-Up #104

Marvel Team-Up #104

Marvel Team-Up #106

Marvel Team-Up #106