Marvel Two-In-One #97
Yesterdaze!
The Thing has agreed to star in a science fiction film called "Mechagrub Meets Goddangit" a film produced by Silver Screen Productions with the proceeds going to the local children's hospital. The Thing is excited about the prospect and tells his teammates in the Fantastic Four and Alicia all about it over breakfast. Reed is suspicious, but after looking over the contract it appears to be legitimate to him.
Elsewhere on the set of Silver Screen Productions, producer Ted Silverberg is struggling to finish his latest production "Sump Thing", however, the low budget and clumsy actors are leaving prospects looking grim, even for drive-in fodder. Silverberg recalls how he had a great production going on until it was ruined when the Thing interfered with it, however, he believes that he has a means of making up for it. He has called in inventor Professor Frankheimer who has produced a new Holoflex projector that can project realistic holograms of objects it views from past eras. To demonstrate the device, Frankheimer uses the special projector to make a prehistoric lizard appear on Silverberg's desk. Impressed by the invention, Silverberg agrees to purchase it. Before leaving the professor warns Silverberg not to leave the projector running too long as it might overheat. After the elderly scientist has left, Silverberg explains to his assistant that he intends to use the device to make the Thing look foolish on camera by tricking him into attacking fake threats, and because Ben Grimm signed off on a release form, nothing can stop Silverberg from releasing the damaging footage after the fact. After marveling at his plan, Silverberg notices that the lizard from the projection has disappeared from their vantage point, but dismisses it as nothing important, unaware that the projector has been left on too long and the lizard has been pulled forward in time.
The following day the Thing has arrived at the set of Silver Screen Pictures dressed to the nines and acting like a Hollywood star, spooking the security guard from his morning paper. While not far away Iron Man flies onto the set and changed into Tony Stark under the cover of bushes. On his way out he runs into actress Bo Drip who asks him if he is the lead in the film "The Ape Man Gets a Hicky". When Stark tells her he is not Tony is spotted by the Thing. The two are happy to meet each other and Ben learns that Stark is on set because his investors at Stark International suggested he put some money into the production company and he has come to check on his investment. As the two walk-off for Ben's make-up call, they are unaware that they are being observed by Silverberg who is looking forward to getting the last laugh against the Thing.
After being put through make-up, the Thing is brought to a set designed to resemble Tokyo for his first scene. In order to try and humiliate the Thing, Silverberg uses the Holoflex to summon the images of Dinosaurs. When a scene calls for the Thing to jump on the back of a pterodactyl, he passes through the Holoflex image and smashes through a billboard. He is later tricked into charging a triceratops and ends up crashing into another set-piece, a noodle shop, getting covered in noodles in the process. Hearing the producer laughing his head off, the Thing is shocked to find that he has been working for Ted Silverberg the whole time. The Thing is furious to realize that this entire shoot was a set up to make him look bad. When Ben gets into Silverberg's face, Ted reminds him of the contract he signed and that Silverberg has full rights to any footage captured for the production. When the Thing tries to take his frustrations out on a Holoflex generated tyrannosaurus rex, Silverberg, and his assistant are surprised when the Thing's kick actually strike the dinosaur instead of passing harmlessly through it. Quickly they come to the realization that because the camera has been on too long the dinosaurs have been transported to the present and are now running amok across the studio.
Hearing the ensuing chaos, Tony Stark slips into a trailer in order to secretly change into Iron Man and lend a hand to the Thing. The two heroes work together to try and contain the rampaging dinosaurs, but they end up wrecking many of the other productions before they realize that the creatures are unacceptable to the cold. Tricking them onto the set of John Carpentry's The Mess, they use the sets snow cannons to freeze the dinosaurs. With the creatures rendered inert, Tony Stark arranges to have the dinosaurs transported to the Savage Land. With his studio in ruins and nothing to show for his revenge, Silverberg is forced to hand over the footage of the Thing to Tony Stark he would consider making everything a tax write off. With no other choice, Silverberg hands over the footage. As Tony and Ben walk away, they destroy the footage, leaving Silverberg to wonder if filmmaker Steven Speilberg ever had days like this.
Recurring Characters
Fantastic Four (Thing, Mister Fantastic, Invisible Girl, Human Torch), Iron Man, Alicia Masters, Franklin Richards
Continuity Notes
The date on the Thing's movie contract reads "November 30, 1982", this date should be considered a topical reference relative to the date of publication per the Sliding Timescale of Earth-616.
Ted Silverberg is seeking revenge against the Thing after ruining his hit television show Monster Man in Marvel Two-In-One #78.
