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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Thor #345

Thor #345

That Was No Lady!

At the office of Eric Willis, the doctor calls his nurse — Miss Ordway — into the room. He quickly ambushes her and ties her up. He then begins taunting her with some fast-food that he recently bought for lunch and decides to force feed her a hamburger. Once he removes her mouth gag, Miss Ordway begins to scream. This is heard by two beat cops on the street who rush into the office to see what’s going on.

Inside, they find Willis be himself by a overturned chair with a pile of dust covered clothes. As they begin questioning Eric about the screams the building janitor happens by and identifies the clothes as what Eric’s secretary was wearing earlier that day. Suspecting foul play, the police officers take Eric Willis into custody.

Elsewhere in the city, Thor — in his civilian identity of Sigurd Jarlson — is out on the town with Melodi, a woman he recently saved from the dragon Fafnir. Little does Thor know that Melodi is actually Lorelei — a fellow Asgardian — who seeks to seduce Thor and make him her slave. She has been spending time with Sigurd waiting for the right moment to trick him into drinking golden mead which will put him fully under her spell. As they take a handsome cab across Central Park, she believes that she will finally succeed by the end of the evening.[1]

By this time, Eric Willis has been locked in a cell at the local precinct. When an officer comes by to check on him she refuses him the chance of a phone call and instead offers to bring him something to eat. This officer uses the phone to call someone and report that Willis is the man they have been looking for and he somehow saw through their operative, Shiela Ordway. The person on the other end of the line tells her what to do and even though this will blow her cover she agrees to follow the orders to the letter. Getting off the phone, the office then begins handing out cookies to the other officers in the bullpen before returning to Willis.

Eric has begun to realize that something is wrong with this situation and that’s when the officer comes back and admits that his suspicions are correct. Since he is trapped with no means of escape, she pushes a tray of cookies into the cell and tells him to give up and surrender to them, warning him that if he continues to resist her master will call down the Wild Hunt upon Eric.

At that moment, the news of Eric’s arrest has reached the law office of Strother and Martin. This is bad news and it prompts Mr. Strother to pull the “Q File” from his personal safe and follow Eric’s written instructions, but hopes that it is not too late.

Asgard

Balder has ridden out to the endless desert on the outskirts of Asgard after he was forced to compromise his vow of pacifism by Loki.[2] Once there, he sends off his horse so that he can wander into the desert and die alone. Before he ventures off into desert, he calls out to death to end his life, little knowing that there is someone following him who seeks to end his life with his own sword.[3]

New York

Sigurd and Melodi have returned to her penthouse apartment after their day out. There Melodi tries to fix him a drink but he’s not interested in one yet. Deciding to pour on the seduction, she then turns on the radio and tells Jarlson that she wants to make the evening perfect for the both of them.

Roslyn, Long Island

Roger Willis has just received a package from Strother and Martin. It contains a letter from his father Eric. It tells Roger that if he is reading it then his father might already be dead and that the object that has been left in his in care is in danger of being found. He asks his son to carry on his mission and leaves him with instructions that will tell him everything he needs to know.

After reading this letter, Roger goes to his closet where he keeps his gun. Loading the weapon and tucking it into the waistband of his pants, Roger then heads to the train station to catch a ride into New York City.

New York

Still locked in a jail cell, Eric Willis decides that he is not going to surrender to his captors. When he discovers a french fry in his pocket he comes up with a way to free himself. After tossing the cookies out the window of his cell he waits for the guard to come back. She thinks that he has eaten the cookies and asks him where he has hidden the casket. When she gets close enough to his cell, Eric shoves the french fry into her mouth, causing her body to suddenly disintegrate leaving only her police uniform and equipment behind. Eric quickly finds the key to his cell.

From the officer’s wallet, Eric is able to purchase bus fare that allows Eric to flee into the suburbs of New York. He is almost convinced that he gave his pursuers the slip until he steps off the bus. That’s when a nearby car turns on its headlights and begin speeding toward him.

Back in the city, Melodi decides to put on something more comfortable and promises to come back with a drink for Sigurd. Thor uses the moment to call Avengers Mansion and see if there are any messages from him. Jarvis answers the call and tells Thor that a message was sent to him from a lawyer at Strother and Martin who was calling about something called the Casket of Ancient Winters. Hearing this name fills Thor is a sudden urgency and he demands to know where he can meet with Strother. He then abruptly tells Melodi that he has to answer an emergency. Once outside the apartment, Sigurd slams Mjolnir against a wall changing his street clothes into the reinment of Thor.

Roslyn, Long Island

Eric Willis is now being pursued by a number of cars. When he begins cutting across lawns, the drivers are forced to get out and pursue him on foot. With his pursuers gaining on him, Eric is relieved when a woman passing by in a car stops to help him get away. The woman introduces herself as Angel and tells Eric that people in distress are her specialty.

New York

Thor arrives at the office of Strother and Martin where he meets with the lawyer. He demands to know what information he has on the Casket of Ancient Winters. He tells the lawyer to hurry because all of this can only mean the return of Malekith the Accursed.

Roslyn, Long Island

Angel continues to drive Eric away from the danger and puts on the radio. The music begins lulling Eric into a sense of security and he begins to wonder if he and Angel haven’t met before. She tells him that they have met in his dreams and stops the car. She then begins to seduce him but refuses to kiss him until he tells her where she can find the Casket of Ancient Winters. Eric begins falling into her spell.

Elsewhere Far Beyond the Fields We Know

Surtur has finished crafting the sword Twilight, the weapon he will use to destroy Asgard once and for all. With the anvil having completed its work, Surtur uses Twilight to split it in two.

Roslyn, Long Island

Eric Willis is dead and Angel has gotten the location of the Casket from him at the moment of his death. Angel turns out to be Malekith in disguise and with his goal in hand he takes off into the sky to summon the Wild Hunt, vowing that nothing will stop him from achieving his goals.

Recurring Characters

Thor, Malekith, Balder, Agnar, Lorelei, Roger Willis, Surtur, Edwin Jarvis, Silverhoof

Continuity Notes

  1. Lorelei has been on Earth trying to seduce Thor since issue #340. He saved her from Fafnir as Sigurd Jarlson in issue #341, giving her an opening to enter his personal life.

  2. Lots to unpack here: Balder went through a period of near death between Thor #274 and 301. During that time his soul was trapped in Hel and he witnessed unspeakable horrors that made him swear off all violence upon his return to the world of the living. Last issue, Loki forced him to slaughter an army of trolls to complete a delivery mission for Odin. Pushed over the edge, Balder then decapitated Loki. This didn’t kill Loki, but Balder doesn’t know that.

  3. This is Agnar of Vanaheim who has been trying to challenge Balder to a duel to the death since issue #338.

Thor #344

Thor #344

Thor #346

Thor #346