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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Thor Annual #17

Thor Annual #17

The Hammer, the Cross, and the Eye

This story continues from Captain America Annual #11

Thor has found himself in the distant past and is being attacked by Vikings and French warriors. Wondering how he gets himself into these kind of messes, he thinks back to the events that led to him being here…

… Thor was at Avengers Headquarters with the rest of the team — Black Widow, Hercules, Crystal, Black Knight, and Sersi — as a report comes in from Captain America. Cap is looking into the disappearance of the Vision after the synthezoid discovered that one of his parts was made in the city of Timely, Wisconsin back in 1939.[1] Captain America has also gone missing and rather than send the entire team to find out why, the Black Widow decides to send Thor instead to scout ahead and report back to the team.

Flying there under the power of Mjolnir, Thor gets lost along the way and has to stop for directions. Thor eventually arrives in Timely and quickly finds one of the Avengers missing Quinjets outside the Timely Electronics Factory. He meets with the floor manager inside and asks where Captain America and the Vision might be. The manager says that only his boss, Mister Johnson, would know and points to an office with a glowing doorway. When Thor decides to go in, the staff try to stop him but he easily pushes his way through.

Crossing through the glowing doorway, Thor finds himself flying over an ancient Mesopotamian city.[2] Off in the distance he sees a futuristic domed city and decides to go and check that out. He soon finds himself passing through another time portal and ends up in the middle of the Trojan War.[3] The next portal he passed through brought him to the scene of the battle between the Vikings and the French armies of King Charles the III. Thus ends Thor’s recollection….

…. Deciding to stop and ask for directions, Thor is attacked. Worse, when he tries to communicate with people he quickly discovers that nobody understands English. He then uses Mjolnir to summon a storm that puts the Viking in awe. Their leader then tries talking to Masterson, but the only thing that gets through is that this guy is named Rollo, aka Hrolf the Walker.

That’s when the French soldiers attack and when Thor tries to come to the aid of the Vikings he’s suddenly blasted by some powerful energy. That’s when King Charles appears with his new ally, Prester John. Thor knows of the Prester having heard about the time he fought the Fantastic Four.[4] John has no idea what he is talking about and explains how he was in fabled Avalon about to enter hibernation for a few centuries when he was attacked by the time traveler known as Kang the Conqueror. Kang sought to recruit Prestor John and his “Eye of Avalon” (which Thor recognizes as the Evil Eye) to help conquer the present day. John refused and in the ensuing conflict with Kang, the Prestor found himself sent back in time to the year 911 AD where he allied himself with “Charles the Simple”.

Deducing that Thor is also time displaced, John pulls him aside so they can talk away from lesser beings. By this time, Thor has figured out the historical significance of the events they interrupted. This was the moment that Charles III would take Rollo in as a vassal, making him the Count of Rouen which leads to the formation of the nation of Normandy. John has convinced Charles III not to do this, thus altering history in a way the Prester finds more suited to his likings as it gives him the opportunity to rule while using Charles as his puppet. Thor realizes that this would greatly change history the consequences of which could be catastrophic. Thor tries to stop John, leading to a fight between the two. In the ensuing clash, Thor is knocked out by a blast from the Eye of Avalon and as he falls down he accidentally taps Mjolnir twice on the ground, causing him to change back into his mortal guise of Eric Masterson. This is a surprise to both Prester John and the arriving Charles III. John decides not to take any risks and prepares to atomize Masterson with another blast from his weapon.

In the present day, Doctor Druid has turned down Nebula’s offer to team up with her. Druid refuses because how she manipulated him in the past and tried to kill him during their last encounter. Nebula says that their past history is unimportant right now as they need to work together to stop Kang the Conqueror before it is too late. Understanding that Kang is a serious threat, Druid reluctantly agrees to join up with her, however he warns Nebula that he’ll be watching her like a hawk.[5]

Back in the year 911 AD, Eric Masterson wakes up and finds himself tied to a stake next to Rollo. Prester John continues to try and convince King Charles to put the pair to death. He then goes about using the Eye to recreate the Avalon that John is destined to live in some 200 years in the future. This includes a giant fire breathing salamander which tries to burn Eric Masterson alive. Luckily, Eric is able to shift over so the flames light the ropes tying his hands on fire so he can break free and recover his walking stick. Transforming back into Thor, Masterson engages Prester John again. This time, the magic of Mjolnir reacts with the Eye, causing Prester John to be returned to his proper place in time and reverting everything back to normal. With the battle over, Thor makes sure that King Charles and Rollo form their truce so that history will be preserved.

With that, Thor continues on his journey to the strange citadel in the distance. However, as he passes through another time portal Eric finds himself on the Immigration Center on Ellis Island sometime in the early 20th century!

This story continues in Fantastic Four Annual #25

Recurring Characters

Thor, Doctor Druid, Prester John, Nebula, Avengers (Captain America, Black Widow, Hercules, Crystal, Black Knight, Sersi, Vision), Gilgamesh

Continuity Notes

  1. The investigation into Vision’s vintage components happened in Captain America Annual #11. Avengers Annual #21 reveals that Timely was the early 20th century base of operations for Kang the Conqueror as part of a long term scheme to conquer the present day. From here he proliferated advance technology, explaining why the present day Marvel Universe has technology more advanced than the real world.

  2. Thor recognizes Gilgamesh among the Mesopotamians. However, Eric Masterson has never met Gilgamesh previously. One could assume that he learned about the Eternal during the period he was merged with the real Thor from Thor #408 to 432, as he had access to all of Thor’s memories — as seen in Thor #415. The real Thor first met Gilgamesh back in Thor #287. Another possibility was Eric read about him from the Avengers database since Gil was a member of the team from Avengers #300 through 310.

  3. Here, Eric remembers how the real Thor was involved in this historical conflict. Thor ended up fighting in this war after going into a time travelling cave that sent him back in time. See Thor Annual #8.

  4. Ol’ PJ fought the Human Torch and Wyatt Wingfoot back in Fantastic Four #54. As we’ll learn later this issue, Prester John appearance here is prior to that meeting.

  5. The whole thing between Kang, “Nebula” and Doctor Druid is rather complicated. Here are the details:

    • At the time of this story everyone believes this woman to be the space pirate named Nebula. In reality, she is Ravonna Renslayer, Kang’s unrequited love. Kang tried to get her to marry him and although he won her over she took a gunshot meant for him and was left in a deathlike state. Kang was given the opportunity to restore her to life but Kang instead used this power to try and kill the Avengers. Feeling sorry for Ravonna, the Grandmaster healed her in secret and put a bio-duplicate in her place. See Avengers #23-24, 69-71 and Avengers Annual #21.

    • Furious that Kang gave up the chance to heal her, Ravonna took on the Nebula disguise and infiltrated the Council of Cross-Time Kangs in an effort to find the true Kang and get her revenge. Also during this time she enslaved Doctor Druid so she could manipulate the Avengers and (later) the Fantastic Four to enter a Time Bubble some 20 years in the future and steal an ultimate weapon to use against Kang. See Avengers #291-297 and Fantastic Four #337-341.

    • These schemes led to both Ravonna and Doctor Druid getting trapped in the Time Bubble. When they escaped, Nebula attempted to alter history to suit her whimsy and when Druid tried to stop her the two fought it out. Druid won after mastering the full potential of his power and drive Ravonna back into the Time Bubblet, as seen in Avengers Spotlight #37.

    • Ravonna got free again in Captain America Annual #11. Her true identity will not be revealed until Avengers Annual #21.

Topical References

  • When Thor stops for directions, there is a painfully cringe gay joke that plays on a harmful stereotype that gay men talk with a lisp. This should be considered a topical reference since this sort of characterization is offensive by today’s standard.

  • When he sees the glowing door, Thor quips that it looks like a special effect out of a Steven Spielberg movie. This is a dated pop-culture reference. Topical.

  • When going through another time portal Thor wonders if he’ll end up in Oz or Twin Peaks. Oz is of course the titular magic land from L. Frank Baum’s classic Wizard of Oz. This wouldn’t be a topical reference as this is a literary classic. References to Twin Peaks would be topical however, as the show was at the height of its popularity at the time this comic was published.

  • The present day is referred to as being in the 20th century in this story. This should be considered a topical reference as the Sliding Timescale has pushed the Modern Age of the Marvel Universe forward in time so that it does not begin until after the start of the 21st century.

  • When threatening Nebula, Doctor Druid quotes a line from The Maltese Falcon a 1930 Dashiell Hammett novel which has been adapted into film twice in 1931 and 1941. This usually would be considered a topical reference, however since Druid was alive in the 20th century and ages very slowly due to his magical powers he would have been alive when these stories came out and part of the popular culture he grew up on.

The Ten Most Heinous Enemies of Mighty Thor

Out on a night of drinking with Hercules, Eric Masterson asks the Olympian to sit down and go over the list of the original Thor’s strongest enemies so he knows who he might have to go up against in the future.[1] Hercules decides to stop goofing around and finally indulge his friend.

At the top of the list is Ego the Living Planet,[2] this is followed by the Grey Gargoyle, the High Evolutionary,[3] the Absorbing Man,[4] Surtur the fire demon, Ulik,[5] the Enchantress, the Destroyer, Hela, and Loki.

When Thor points out that Loki is dead,[4] Hercules reminds him that death is not as permanent for immortals than it is for others and warns him to prepare to resume his namesake’s eternal battle with the trickster god. With that, the pair propose a toast to Thor.

Recurring Characters

Thor, Hercules

Continuity Notes

  1. The real Thor has been banished at the time of this story and his powers and mantle was given to Eric Masterson, as seen in Thor #432. This will remain the status quo until issue #457.

  2. Here, Hercules states “Ego’s life force may have been absorbed to bring forth a new life in the ranks of the Celestials.” As seen in Thor #132, Ego originated from a unique bio-verse that existed in the middle of the Black Galaxy. Many years later, the bio-verse was used to bring a new Celestial to life as seen in Thor #419-424. Ego did not perish in this event however, he had been out of the bio-verse for some time after having a propulsion unit stuck on his south pole back in Thor #226-228. In fact, Ego was recently seen by Beta Ray Bill in Thor Annual #16. One could presume that this news had not reached Hercules at the time of this story.

  3. Hercules mentions the High Evolutionary’s aptly named Evolutionary War, which Hercules boasts playing a part in stopping. He’s not wrong. See X-Factor Annual #3, Punisher Annual #1, Silver Surfer Annual #1, New Mutants Annual #4, Amazing Spider-Man Annual #22, Fantastic Four Annual #21, Uncanny X-Men Annual #12, Web of Spider-Man Annual #4, West Coast Avengers Annual #3, Spectacular Spider-Man Annual #8, Avengers Annual #17.

  4. Thor mentions here that he has heard that the Absorbing Man has gone straight. Thor “heard” right because he was actually present when Crusher Creel made that decision in Thor #436. Absorbing Man will more or less stay out of trouble (yet still hang out with his super-villain buddies) until Daredevil #359-360.

  5. Eric reminds Hercules that he’s already met Ulik in the past. Eric Masterson has encountered Ulik when he was merged with the true Thor in issues #413-414, 418, 426-428, 430-431 and later as the replacement Thor in issue #433.

  6. Loki was seemingly killed by Thor in Thor #432. In reality, the trickster cheated death by having his spirit take possession of Odin’s body. This will be exposed and Odin freed over the course of Thor #450-455.

Looking for Trouble

Volstagg is rushing to get ready for a night out with his long time comrades in arms. After struggling to find his comb and almost tripping over one of Mick’s toys, Volstagg is soon on his way. He first stops at the home of Hogun the Grim, who welcomes him in. When Volstagg’s massive bulk accidentally knocks over a suit of armor and weapons on display they decide to head out before his girth causes more damage. At the door, they find a female Rock Troll who pleads with the pair to help her find her missing husband. They reluctantly agree to help and head into Asgard to find Fandral. With the Warriors Three now reunited, they asks the troll to tell them who her husband is and where he might have gone. She reveals that she is the wife of Ulik, and that she fears that he died in battle.

Although they are reluctant to help find one of their greatest foes, the sobbing Rock Troll makes them feel bad and they decide to help after all. They take her to the Grand Vizier who casts a spell to see where Ulik is at that very moment. The grieving wife is furious to discover that not only is Ulik alive, but he’s off somewhere on a vacation by himself and storms off planning to give him an earful when he gets back. Considering their job done, the Warriors Three head to a local tavern. However, their night of revalry comes to a quick end when Ulik comes storming in looking to get revenge on the trio for snitching him out on his wife.

Recurring Characters

Warriors Three (Fandral, Hogun, Volstagg), Hildegund, Mick Mortensen, Kevin Mortensen, Ulik, Grand Vizier

Topical References

  • Mick and Kevin are arguing over which band is better: U2 or Kiss. I’d argue both are equally terrible, but that’s just me. Mick even mocks guitarist Bruce Kulick. This should be considered a topical reference as these are real world bands. More over, Bruce Kulick was only a member of Kiss from 1984 until 1996.

Paradise Lost

This story continues from Captain America Annual #11

Kang the Conqueror continues his reflection on his life while mourning the fate of his beloved Ravonna. He thinks back, after his first defeat at the hands of the Avengers he sought to conquer the entire universe of his native 41st century. Something he accomplished with great ease.[1] Although this was incredibly easy, Kang still looked to the past seeking to conquer the modern age and defeat the Avengers. Looking into the past he saw that another time traveler calling himself Immortus clashed with the heroes, giving him inspiration to renew his attacks on the Avengers once more.[2] Kang attempted to attack the Avengers with a robotic duplicate of Spider-Man that he sent back in time. However, the robot was ultimately stopped the real web-slinger.[3]

Unable to get a foothold in the present day, Kang sought to conquer an earlier era and chose to conquer Camelot during a period its champion, the Black Knight, was off fighting Morgan le Fay. Kang was able to defeat Merlin with his science and the Knights of the Round Table with his advanced weapons. However, his plans to conquer this era and through it the present day were thwarted when the Watcher send the Human Torch and the Thing back in time to thwart Kangs plans.[4] After this, Kang was manipulated by Doctor Doom to attack the wedding of Reed and Sue Richards of the Fantastic Four, only to be defeated once more.[5]

After his last defeat, Kang focused on his continued conquest. Focusing on a lone kingdom that he had spared because he loved their Princess Ravonna. When Ravonna refused his hand in marriage, he quickly conquered her kingdom. Then tried to show his might by bringing the Avengers to his era and defeating them in combat. However, his love for Ravonna did not sit well with his minions. Baltag, his second in command, then staged a mutiny which forced Kang to side with the Avengers to save Ravonna’s kingdom. This act of selflessness and bravery convinced Ravonna to finally love him. Tragically, however, Baltag managed to get a gun and tried to shoot Kang. Seeing what was going to happen, Ravonna stepped in the way taking the shot meant for him. Baltag was killed on the spot, but there was nothing that could save Ravonna. In order to preserve his beloved until a cure could be found.[6]

However, Baltag’s rebellion soon spread like the plague and Kang needed to travel back in time and recover one of his Growing Man androids to help quell the violence. This led to a clash with Thor. Recovering his Growing Man and trying to flee in his time machine, Thor tried to trap him in an infinity vortex. Kang recalls that despite this effort to stop him, he returned to his own time and used the Growing Man to quell the rebellion.[7]

Kang was later offered an opportunity to save Ravonna’s life by entering into a contest with the cosmic being known as the Grandmaster. The Elder of the Universe and Kang entered a contest to see if the Avengers could win against his the Grandmaster’s champions the Squadron Sinister. Kang won that wager and was given the power over life (to save Ravonna) or death (to kill the Avengers). His desire for revenge proved greater than his need for Ravonna and he attempted to slay the Avengers. This backfired on him as this power had no effect on the Black Knight, who wasn’t officially an Avenger at the time and he was able to strike Kang before he could kill his comrades.[8] With that the Grandmaster left, but Kang felt as though the Elder wasn’t finished with his revenge. Realizing that he gave up love for petty revenge, Kang has come to realize that his entire life is empty and without love.

This story continues in Fantastic Four Annual #25

Recurring Characters

Kang the Conqueror

Continuity Notes

  1. Kang’s future actually exists in an alternate reality. Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe: Alternate Realities 2005 #1 identifies it as “Other-Earth” otherwise known as Reality-6311. He was first defeated by the Avengers in Avengers #8

  2. Kang is observing the Avengers first encounter with Immortus circa Avengers #10. What Kang doesn’t know at this time is that Immortus is a future version of himself. Kang won’t learn this truth until Giant-Size Avengers #3.

  3. The Spider-Man robot was built by Kang back in Avengers #11.

  4. The battle over Camelot was chronicled in Strange Tales #134. There are some details here that are omitted in this retelling:

    • It’s later revealed in Avengers Annual #22 that the Merlin that Kang fought was an impostor who will later go by the Maha Yogi.

    • Here, Kang finds it suspicious that, during this story, the Watcher claimed to exist in Limbo, the domain of Immortus. The implication is that this was Immortus posing as Uatu. However, all other references to the events of this story, Handbook entires, and Immortus’ own recollection of past schemes don’t make this connection at all. In fact, all other sources state that this was indeed Uatu the Watcher.

    • Although Kang speaks of this battle as though he personally experienced it. However, Avengers Forever #9 reveals that this was actually the work of a divergent Kang. Some time later, Kang would slay all his divergent counterparts and absorb all their knowledge. This process drove Kang mad for a time. See Avengers #267-269.

  5. Kang was one of an entire army of super-villains duped into attacking the Richards wedding in Fantastic Four Annual #3.

  6. The Kang/Ravonna storyline happened in Avengers #23-24. It’s later revealed in Kang the Conquror #1-5 that after Ravonna was incapacitated Kang built a device that sent her consciousness across time and space where she would be reborn over and over. Talk about not being able to let go!

  7. Kang’s recovery of the Growing Man and his clash with the thunder god took place in Thor #140. Again, per Avengers Forever #9 reveals that this actually created another divergence. One version of Kang ended up back in his future where he crushed the rebellion, the other ended up in Immortus’ Limbo dimension circa Avengers #267-269 and went about eliminating every divergent Kang except for his “Prime” self.

  8. This was the so-called Game of Galaxies, which was chronicled in Avengers #69-71. Again, Avengers Forever #9 states that this wasn’t the Prime Kang, but one of the divergents. Specifically, this was the one that ended up in the 41st century following the battle with Thor, while the Prime one ended up in Limbo.

Topical References

  • The present day is referred to as being in the 20th century in this story. This should be considered a topical reference as the Sliding Timescale has pushed the Modern Age of the Marvel Universe forward in time so that it does not begin until after the start of the 21st century.

Supplement Material

This issue also features a number of pin-ups that include: A two-page spread of Thor battling Ulik and a group shot of the Thor Corps.

Citizen Kang Reading Order

Thor #446

Thor #446

Thor #447

Thor #447