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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Thor (vol. 2) #72

Thor (vol. 2) #72

The Reigning, Part 4: Paradise Lost

In the year 2170, Thor rules over Midgard shepherding it to what outwardly appears to be a utopia.[1] However, there are cracks if you happen to know where to look. Thialfi was shown many of them. In a world where humanity has been given everything they want without any work, they have become lazy and complacent. Worse, those who seek to liberate humanity — led by a mutant sorceress named Kya — have shown him Mjolnir, Thor’s long lost hammer. They told him that Thor is no longer worthy of lifting it. He isn’t sure if he saw the real thing or not, but if there is truth to what they say, then that means everything has gone horribly wrong. Thialfi, who has had unwavering loyalty to Thor from the very start now finds himself conflicted on what to do.

That’s when he hears Thor demanding to know what happened last night. Thialfi turns around thinking he’s been caught, but in reality the Lord of Midgard is reaming out his son, Magni, for not being present during the party to celebrate Thialfi’s return. Thialfi quickly interrupts this argument and bows, saying that no offense was taken. Magni asks Thialfi to get back up, saying he was never comfortable with ceremony. They shake hands, and Thialfi admits that Magni reminds him much of his father when he was a younger man. Thor isn’t swayed by the deviating conversation and although he has calmed down, he still wants to know where his son was. Magni is playing it coy and evading specifics until Loki comes in and says that he was out with Jordhal, the young mortal woman that Thor met in their dungeons.[2] While Loki has his suspicions about her, none of the others share it. Still, Thor is upset that his son was dallying with mortals, but Magni doesn’t want to listen and walks away.

With Magni gone, Loki tries to convince both Thor and Thialfi that Jordhal is a threat to securty, citing her thievery and the fact that she collects forbidden technology. Neither agree with the trickster. That’s when they remember that Thialfi disappeared in the middle of his own party and asks what happened to him. Thialfi implies that he bedded a woman that evening but doesn’t kiss and tell. This gladden Thor who is happy to hear that he got laid. Loki, on the other hand, presses the issues with security, saying that the situation in Spain is worsening. When Thialfi asks what he means, Lord Thor explains that for some reason the locals there have started revolting against Asgardian rule. Loki says that in the past they’ve had to banished, but in extreme cases others have been put to death. Thor says that it is ugly work as he never wants to force people’s loyalty to him and most are willing to accept him on their own terms. Still, if others seek to victimize other humans then he has to step in. Thor orders that Fandral and Hogun be dispatched with some troops to assess the situation. When Loki suggests that Magni accompany them to give the boy perspective on mortals, Thor agrees.

When Loki leaves, Thor invites Thialfi to join him on an inspection of the Fourth Army. Thialfi takes the alone time to ask Thor once again what became of Mjolnir. Thor states that its usefulness to him left after he lost his left arm and will only say he lost it some time ago.[3] When he presses the issue, Thor tells him that he only tolerates being questioned because of their long history of friendship. When Thialfi tells him that he may have found Mjolnir, Thor refuses to listen, saying the weapon was irreversibly destroyed and orders the subject never be brought up again. As Thialfi walks away, he is stopped by Loki who wants to know why he is here if he is constantly questioning the rule of the royal family. Thialfi says he means no disrespect and affirms that he is loyal and even bows before Loki. The trickster isn’t fully convinced, and decides that Thialfi should accompany them to Spain to be educated as well.

Soon, Fandral, Hogun, Magni, and Thialfi are off with a team of Asgardians to quell the uprising in Spain. Loki watches them go and wonders who put the rebellious thoughts in Thialfi’s mind. He heads down to check on trump card and confirms it is still safely locked away.[4] He won’t need it yet, but he needs to find out more about this sudden rebellious streak.

Meanwhile, the ride to Spain gives Thialfi and Magni some time to get to know one another. He tells Thor’s son that he is not unlike his father who in his youth regularly quarreled with his father, usually about his interactions with mortals. This comes as a surprise to Magni, whose father doesn’t like to speak of the past and his mother — Amora the Enchantress — believing that mortals are beneath her notice. Their conversation is cut short when the town they are approaching begins opening fire with recovered artillery cannons. However, before Thialfi and Magni can get involved, the battle ends thanks to Hogun’s savagery. The warrior has not forgiven the humans for destroying Asgard, and when Thialfi and Magni arrive they are horrified to see the Warriors Three and the others slaughtering people. Thialfi begs Hogun to stop as they have surrended. However, one of the humans pulls a gun and tries to shoot the pair. Hogun deflects the shots with his mace and then crushes the man’s skull, telling Thialfi that humans are full of trechery.

However, before the slaughter can continue, Magni orders everyone to stand down and drop their weapons. Getting an order from the prince causes everyone to pause long enough for Thialfi to snatch all of their weapons away. The young prince is also appalled by the senseless slaughter. That’s when one of the humans opens his coat to reveal he is wearing a suicide vest and would rather become a martyr than live under Asgardian rule a moment longer. Realizing that this will harm countless mortals, Magni rushes the man and hugs him tight just as he presses down the detonator. Everyone is worried that Magni was killed by the blast, but the boy is just as durable as his father was. Still, Magni was shaken by the suicide bomber’s actions and can’t believe that the humans could hate his people so much. Oblivious to anything but the prince’s survival all the soldiers begin to celebrate their victory.

Meanwhile, in Bostogard, Jordhal answers a knock at the door and invites in a man who appears to be Magni. However, this is Loki in disguise and with his disguise totally fooling the young girl, he asks her to tell him everything about her encounter with Thialfi.

Recurring Characters

Thor, Magni, Thialfi, Warriors Three (Fandral, Hogun, Volstagg), Jordhal, Loki

Continuity Notes

  1. From the “Shit You Need to Know Off the Top Dept.”:

    • The events of this story take place in a possible future that now exists in another reality. Per Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe A-Z #2, it has been desigated as Reality-3515. It was to be the future of Reality-616 until a divergence in Thor (vol. 2) #79 changed the course of history.

    • Zarrko the Tomorrow Man was trying to prevent this future from coming to past since Thor (vol. 2) #33. Unfortunately, he was captured by Thor in issue #53. He disappeared while trying to escape during the assault on Asgard, the catalyst that started this nightmare, see Thor (vol. 2) #66-67. During that battle, Thialfi fell through a time portal and only just recently appeared in 2170, as we saw in issue #69.

    • During the final battle, Thor became unworthy to lift Mjolnir after he killed his human half, Jake Olson. It has remained in the ruins of New York for over a century. It was recently uncovered by a group seeking to free humanity. Thialfi was shown it last issue.

  2. Jordhal got entangled in the Asgardian business when Thialfi literally landed on top of her as he appeared in this time period in issue #69.

  3. Thor lost his arm in a battle against his former friends and allies, thanks to Wolverine’s Adamantium claws. See next issue for all the gory details.

  4. Loki has locked away the Destroyer, who is being powered by Tarene — and you thought they forgot about her, huh? See Thor (vol. 2) #78 for the big reveal.

Topical References

  • This story is stated as happening in the year 2170. Given how far away this date it, one could consider its use here as factual.

Thor (vol. 2) #71

Thor (vol. 2) #71

Thor (vol. 2) #73

Thor (vol. 2) #73