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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

New Thunderbolts #5

New Thunderbolts #5

Call to Battle?

Abner Jenksin (aka Mach-IV) was meeting with his parole officer Carol Danvers (aka Warbird), when the Brooklyn Bridge is suddenly attacked by Fathom Five (Llyron, Bloodtide, Sea Leopard, Dragonrider, and Manowar), an Atlantean terrorist group. While Carol changes into Warbird to fight the group she orders Abe — whose Mach-IV suit is still in disrepair — orders him to summon the rest of the Thunderbolts. However, after rescuing people from the East River, Abner discovers that his communicator has been waterlogged and doesn’t work. He then begins trying to find someone in the panicked crowd who can lend him their cell phone.

The attack makes the news and the reporting is watched on TV by Atlas (Erik Josten) who is visiting Songbird (Melissa Gold) at Cedars-Sinai Hospital. Melissa’s voice is still healing after she overworked her powers when the team recently saved the United Nations.[1] Erik tells her to stay because she is still on the mend. As Atlas jumps out the window, he grows to giant size and begins rushing to the scene on foot. As he goes, Melissa wonders why she has some nagging distrust over him and the rest of the team.[2] She pushes these thoughts aside to call back to headquarters to see who else can help.

The only person there to answer the phone is the recently recruited Radioactive Man (Chen Lu). He agrees to help, but this will take some time since he doesn’t know how to drive or what a taxi cab is. When he is asked about the others — the Blizzard (Donny Gill), Speed Demon (James Sanders), and Joystick (Janice Yanizeski) — he can only say that they have gone out. The trio of new recruits are sitting on pervert’s row at a strip club. When Donny looks over at a TV hanging over the bar he sees news about the attack on the Brooklyn Bridge. He tries to tell James and Janice about what’s going on and suggests they do something, because itis the right thing to do. However, the pair are uninterested in risking their necks for nothing and want to stick around and have fun.[3]

Back at the scene of the battle, Warbird is struggling against Fathom Five and is ultimately knocked out by an electrical jolt from Manowar. That’s when Atlas is on the scene. Abner assures Erik that the rest of the team is coming before leaping into the river to save Carol. When Warbird recovers she hands him her cell phone and tells her to call a special number and enter a four digit code before passing out again. The call transmits an authorization to a storage facility run by the Commission on Superhuman Activities. After verifying, two technicians load up Abner’s old Beetle armor for transport.

Meanwhile, the Radioactive Man is trying to find a taxi to get him to the site of the battle. However, everyone is fleeing the area and unwilling to stop for him. That is until a police car rolls up and the officers try to put him under arrest.[4] Chen reminds the officers that he is part of the Thunderbolts now and demands that they drive him to the scene of the battle or else he will use his powers to make them sterile. After a moments consideration, the two officers put away their weapons and do what is asked of them.

While at the strip club, Donny is still trying to convince James and Janice to do something about the battle. Sanders pretends to need to go to the bathroom, but in reality he is actually changing into Speed Demon and races to the scene to join the battle without the others.

At the scene of the battle, Atlas’ ionic powers are also affecting his temperament, pushing him to the brink of going berserk fighting Llyron. Abner still can’t do much without his armor, but manages to shock Bloodtide with an exposed wire. However, he is ambushed from behind by Sea Leopard. But, before the villain can harm him further, Speed Demon arrives on the scene and wraps up Abe’s attacker with a metal bar before speeding back to the strip club. He then tries to convince Donny to go join the fight if that’s what he really wants to do. Gill, is still uncertain what to do.

By this time, Atlas has killed Dragonrider’s sea cature, and a capsule containg Abner’s Beetle armor has arrived on the scene. However, before Jenkins can suit up, he is attacked by Llyron who easily overpowers him. Luckliy, Radiactive Man arrives on the scene. As the two fight, Abner tells Chen to use his powers to dehydrate Llyron for a faster defeat. Once suited up in his Beetle armor, Jenkins helps Atlas finish off both Dragonrider and Manowar. That’s when he notices that Chen Lu is using his radioactivity to burn Llyron. Jenkins understands that Chen is deeply upset for Fathom Five’s previous attack on China, but convinces him to spare Llyron’s life so he can be punished by law.[5]

With the battle over, there is only mere moments before the area is rocked by explosions. This is observed by coroner in Cape May, New Jersey, who was about to perform an autopsy on a body encased in a strange yellow cocoon. As he is distracted by the news story, he fails to see his patient come back to life.[6] While at the hospital, Melissa is suiting up in her Songbird costume as she watches the latest developments. At the stripclub, this new threat prompts Speed Demon to speed abruptly speed off again convincing Donny and Janice that they should do something about this new crisis as well.

The crisis in in question is the sudden appearance of Hydra attack ships that have appeared over Manhattan. Seeing them in the air, Abner — whose Thunderbolt outfit was being secretly funded by Hydra’s leader, Baron Strucker — realizes that all of their recent activities were merely distractions while Hydra prepared for this final assault.[7]

Addressing the entire city, Baron Strucker delivers a message. After a cry of “Hail Hydra!”, Strucker tells the entire city to prepare for death!

Recurring Characters

Thunderbolts (Mach-IV, Songbird, Atlas, Speed Demon, Joystick, Radioactive Man, Blizzard), Fathom Five (Llyron, Bloodtide, Sea Leopard, Dragonrider, Manowar), Warbird, Hydra (Baron Strucker), Captain Marvel (unidentified)

Continuity Notes

  1. Songbird wrecked her throat helping to keep the UN Building standing after bombs went off inside, as seen in New Thunderbolts #3.

  2. Songbird has many reasons not to trust her teammates in the Thunderbolts even though she might not know the reasons why. The reasons are:

    • Mach-IV is being evasive about who is financing this incarnation of the Thunderbolts. However in New Thunderbolts #1 we learned that he is getting financing from Baron Strucker of Hydra who wants to use the Thunderbolts as part of a scheme to destroy New York as we’ll see next issue.

    • Atlas is untrustworthy because he has been lying about what happened to Captain Marvel during their first mission since the team was reformed in issue #1. Atlas tossed Genis into the ocean and left him for dead. He’s still alive, however, as we’ll learn next issue.

  3. The news states that the Avengers have recently disbanded, which happened in Avengers #500-503. A new incarnation of the team will be formed in New Avengers #1-5. The news also states that the Fantastic Four are unavailable. This is because the Fantastic Four are among the many heroes trying to save a brainwashed Wolverine from Hydra, as seen in Wolverine (vol. 3) #22 and New Invaders #9.

  4. One of the cops recalls how his father saw Thor battle the Radioactive Man, “back in the day.” Indeed, the Radioactive Man was originally one of Thor’s rogues gallery in the early years of the Modern Age. They first fought in Journey into Mystery #93. Per the Sliding Timescale, the battle being referenced here could have happened as far back as 11 years prior to the main story.

  5. What we will later find out is that Chen will contaminate the members of Fathom Five with radiation in order to infect their masters, the terrorist organization known as At’Lan’Tique in the hopes of killing the entire cell. This ultimately creates a deadly plague in Atlantis itself, as we’ll learn in New Thunderbolts #9.

  6. This cocoon was discovered by a tour boat last issue. Next issue we’ll learn that this is the MIA Captain Marvel.

  7. Among these diversions, Abner mentions the Thunderbolts recent battle with the Wrecking Crew in New Thunderbolts #2.

Topical References

  • Warbird’s cell phone is depicted as a flip-phone. This style of cellular device was pretty common around the time this issue was published. While they still exist today, they have fallen out of popular due to the advent of the smart phone and are on their way into obsolescence. As such its depiction here should be considered topical.

New Thunderbolts #4

New Thunderbolts #4

New Thunderbolts #6

New Thunderbolts #6