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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Thunderbolts #73

Thunderbolts #73

Becoming Heroes, Part 5: No Lose

In Symkaria, the Thunderbolts — Hawkeye (Clint Barton), Songbird (Melissa Gold), Blackheath (Sam Smithers), Amazon (Katrina Van Horn), Cyclone (Pierre Fresson), Harrier (Don Clendenon), and Skein (Sybil Dorvak) — have just stopped the unleashing of a deadly bio-toxin.[1] However, as one crisis is coming to an end, a new one is rearing its ugly head.

Hawkeye and the others have are being visited by Citizen V (John Watkins III) who has come seeking the Thunderbolts assistance. He explains that the engines of the V-Battalion’s ship, the Vanguard, has been spewing radiation and sucking matter into a white hole. Hawkeye, given the Thunderbolts’ checkered history with Citizen V, is reluctant to help.[2] Hawkeye is uninterested in helping, telling Citizen V to get help somewhere else. That’s when V activates a holographic projector so that the V-Battalion’s newest member, Jim Hammond, can personally request for help. Since Clint has a history with the original Human Torch,[3] he asks his team if they want to help. Not only do the other Thunderbolts agree to save the world again, SHIELD agent Dum Dum Dugan decides to give them a chance to try.

That’s when Silver Sable — who finally got free since they were all captured by the Masters of Evil — arrives and suggests that they use the Crimson Cowl’s teleportation cloak to teleport mass into the white hole. It will require Skein using her textile telekinesis to stitch it back together. While the other Thunderbolts are reluctantly agreeing to this plan, Cyclone refuses to do anything unless they are getting paid for it. Willing to oblige, Silver Sable offers a cheque that Cyclone can fill out with whatever six figure amount will make him happy. Before Pierre can take it, Hawkeye fires an arrow that pins the cheque to a nearby wall. Clint tells the others that being a hero does not work that way and they won’t seek payment for saving the world. This is the last straw for Cyclone who decides that being a Thunderbolt just isn’t worth it and decides to leave. However, the moment he does, Hawkeye hits him with a stun arrow. He then tells Pierre and the others that if they do choose to leave, they become outlaws again and Dum Dum Dugan will arrest them on the spot. This is enough of an incentive to get the rest of the team in line.

Twenty minutes later, the team is at Castle Mesada, the headquarters of the V-Battalion. Seeing the energy radiating from the Vanguard makes Hawkeye nervous, but they press forward anyway. They meet with Elizabeth Barstow who tells them that the growing mass needs to be plugged up and unfortunately nearly all of the Battalion’s technicians and super-human muscle were seemingly lost to the void that is growing within the ship.[4] The Thunderbolts are lead into the Vanguard by Citizen V. Once inside, Hawkeye splits the team up into three group so they can simultaneously stuff the void with matter from all sides until it is plugged up. Citizen V and Silver Sable are sent to the engine room, Blackheath and Songbird to the hydroponics lab, and lastly Hawkeye, Harrier, Skein, and Amazon remain on deck one.

As Hawkeye’s team reaches their part of the void, Harrier flies ahead and ends up flying into it. Despite the fact that Don obviously has a problem with him, Clint hands Amazon a line arrow and dives in after Harrier. Amazon and Skein put all their strength into pulling both Hawkeye and Harrier out of the void. Don is shocked that Hawkeye risked his life to save him when he had no idea what was in the void. All Clint cared about was that Don was in there and needed to save him.[5]

On the way to the hydroponics lab, Blackheath explains his connection to “The Green” — the embodiment of plant life on Earth — to Songbird. He is upset that he has done little for it after all the power he has given. When they reach the lab, he hears the suffering of the plants that have been experimented upon here by the V-Battalion. When Melissa suggests using the plants to plug up the void on their side, he is more than willing to do so in order to end the plant’s suffering. However, it is a painful process as he can feel the deaths of all the plants that he is sacrificing.

While on deck six, Silver Sable and Citizen V reach their part of the void. While Sable uses the Crimson Cowl’s cloak to teleport debris into the void, Citizen V sets up demolition charges to bring down the ceiling. Sable recalls how the Vanguard was constructed using technology that the V-Battalion acquired from alien races. The engines in particular were recovered from a partially phased craft found buried in a Siberian mine in 1966.

After a while their efforts are doing very little to fill the void. Eventually, the data that Harrier’s scanners picked up from inside the void determine that it is bottomless. Hawkeye’s team then narrowly avoids getting swallowed up when the void suddenly expands. Luckliy, Amazon is able to punch a hole up to the level where Songbird and Blackheath have been trying in vein to plug things up. Hawkeye decides that the best course of action is to go back into the void and try to shut it down on the other side, something he insists on doing himself. Using a line arrow as an anchor, Clint then dives in. After a few moments, Songbird decides to go in after him. The rest of the team also volunteer to leap in after him as well. Using Skein and Blackheath’s powers to create lines for themselves, they hand the reins over to Amazon to be their anchor.

Moments after the rest of the team leaps in, Amazon feels a powerful pull on her lines and struggles to keep from being pulled in. She eventually manages to stabilize herself and is surprised to see that she still has hold of her comrades. Suddenly, the void vanishes ejecting the Thunderbolts from it as it closes up. Songbird and the others recall seeing others in the void and wonder if they went through. Hawkeye, who has a gun to his head, confirms that they aren’t alone![6]

Recurring Characters

Thunderbolts (Hawkeye, Songbird, Amazon, Blackheath, Cyclone, Harrier, Skein), V-Battalion (Citizen V, Betty Barstow, Jim Hammond), Silver Sable, Justine Hammer, Dum Dum Dugan

Continuity Notes

  1. This team of Thunderbolts have been attempting to shut down the utilization of this bio-toxin over the course of Thunderbolts #65, 67, 69, and 71.

  2. The Citizen V identity has led to a lot of problems for the Thunderbolts. For Hawkeye in particular, it was the time when Dallas Riordan was Citizen V, leading to a clash between the two groups as seen in Thunderbolts #40-41.

  3. Hawkeye and the original Human Torch served together on the West Coast Avengers, as seen in Avengers West Coast #58-63. Hammond has been affiliated with the V-Battalion in Citizen V and the V-Battalion: The Everlasting #3-4.

  4. At the time of this story, the V-Battalion’s superhuman members had been greatly diminished. The details:

    • Roger Aubrey, aka the Destroyer, retired in Citizen V and the V-Battalion: The Everlasting #4.

    • Goldfire and Ironcross were both killed in action in Citizen V and the V-Battalion: The Everlasting #2 and 3 respectively.

    • According to the V-Battalion entry in Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe A-Z #12, the two remaining members — Nuklo and Topspin — were lost to the void. As of this writing, Topspin (October, 2023) remains unaccounted for. Nuklo, on the other hand, turned up at Pleasant Hill, a SHIELD run prison for super-villains, as seen in All-New All-Different Avengers #8. Why was Nuklo locked up? As of this writing, it has not been explained.

  5. Harrier has had it out for Hawkeye after the Crimson Cowl convinced him into thinking that Clint was responsible for the death of his daughter, Valerie Burnhardt (aka Meteorite) in Thunderbolts #64, she died in issue #56 at the hands of Graviton, BTW. According to the Cowl, Hawkeye inspired the Commission on Superhuman Activities to created the Redeemers, the team Meteorite joined up with before she died.

  6. This is Baron Zemo’s Thunderbolts team from Counter-Earth. How they got into the void and returned to their proper home is explained next issue.

Topical References

  • Dugan quips that the Thunderbolts will be able to get on CNN by bedtime. This should be considered a topical reference as CNN is a real world new network.

  • After Hawkeye saves Harrier, Amazon quips that the rescue was almost enough to make Harrier “switch sides”. This is a subtle reference to the fact that Amazon is a lesbian and “switching sides” is code here for someone suddenly deciding to be homosexual. At the time this story was published, homosexuality was still considered somewhat taboo and was when it was portrayed at all, it was for reasons that were inappropriate. In this case, the idea of being gay is being presented as a choice and is being used as the punchline of a joke as male homosexuality was often portrayed during the time of this publication. This sort of human is considered inappropriate by today’s standard as it would be considered “punching down” at a marginalized group.

  • Silver Sable states that the alien technology used to make the Vanguard’s engines were recovered in 1966. As the V-Battalion was founded during World War II, this would not necessarily be considered a topical reference. However, any measurement of time between 1966 and the Modern Age of the Marvel Universe would be, as the Sliding Timescale bumps the present day foward in time.

  • When discussing how ravenous the void is, Songbird quips that it is hungrier than Al Roker. Al Roker is a long running weather anchor on NBC news. At the time this comic was published, Roker was known for being overweight, hence the low-ball joke. However, Roker had undergone gastric bypass surgery the year before this comic was published and began losing weight. As such this should be considered a topical reference, particularly if you were going to punch down like this, there are more contemporary celebrities you could name drop.

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