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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Captain America #381

Captain America #381

This Gun’s For Hire

Found guilty of betraying the Serpent Society, Diamondback was slated to be executed via lethal injection.[1] She managed to escape thanks to Sidewinder, the Serpent Society’s former leader, who did it as a favor to his ex-girlfriend, Black Mamba.[2] Sidewinder tells Rachel that her next move should be going into hiding like he will, since it won’t take long for the Serpent Society to track them back to his home. Diamondback however wants to go back and rescue her friends, Asp and Black Mamba, who will be punished for helping her escape. Sidewinder, however, refuses to help as he is more concerned with saving his own hide.

Sidewinder’s predictions are correct as at that moment the Serpent Society’s current leader, King Cobra, is sending out his teammates to try and recapture Diamondback. He sends Black Racer, Rattler, and Coachwhip to Sidewinder’s place and dispatches Anaconda, Puff Adder, and Rock Python to go to Diamondback’s place. He also sends Fer-De-Lance and Cottonmouth to stake out Avengers Headquarters in case Diamondback flees there. With everyone else gone on their various missions, King Cobra and Bushmaster go to deal with the traitors in their midst.[3]

Meanwhile, Steve Rogers and John Jameson are out at a diner for a bite to eat. There, Steve tells John about his recent reunion with his former girlfriend Bernie Rosenthal. He admits that he was reluctant to tell Bernie about his current relationship with Diamondback. This is mostly because he can’t really explain Rachel in a way that Bernie would understand because the two women are so different from one another.[4] Jameson thinks Steve is overthinking things, pointing out that while he and Rachel are dating, they haven’t agreed on any kind of commitment. Their conversation is interrupted when Steve gets a call from Peggy Carter. Peggy just got word from Diamondback, who has asked Steve meet her at the library as soon as possible. Suspecting something is wrong, Steve changes into Captain America and has John drive him to down to the meeting place.[5]

When Cap meets up with Diamondback, she explains everything that has happened to her and how they need to rescue Asp and Black Mamba from the Serpent Society. Cap wants to help, but he tells her that he can’t guarantee that he can protect Rachel’s friends from the law. Mistaking this for Cap not wanting to help shield the pair, Rachel gets upset and flees in a taxi cab before Steve can fully explain himself. Wanting to go after her, Cap calls John to swing the car around so he can follow Diamondback’s cab.

At that same moment, back at the Serpent Society hideout, King Cobra and Bushwacker catch Black Mamba and Asp trying to pack up their things to flee. Black Mamba tries to use her powers of seduction to cloud King Cobra’s mind but Bushwacker counter acts it by swiping away her erotic illusions of Coachwhip. Although Asp incapacitates Bushmaster with one of her venom blasts, the two women are taken down by knock out gas fired from King Cobra’s gauntlets.

Fifteen minutes later, Diamondback has gone to a shady bar to find someone she can hire to help her free her friends. The bartender knows just who she should call and hands her a business card for a soldier of fortune named Paladin.

At the same time, Cap and John have lost track of Diamondback’s cab so Steve decides to head back to Rachel’s apartment to see if she’ll turn up there. There, Anaconda, Puff Adder, and Rock Python are still waiting around to see if Diamondback shows up. Growing bored, Anaconda decides to go up onto the roof to make out with Puff Adder while they wait. Moments later, Captain America arrives and spots a Serpent Saucer on the roof and prepares to ambush the snakes that are hanging around.

A few minutes later, Diamondback meets up with Paladin at the agreed upon rendezvous point. Hearing Rachel’s story, Paladin agrees to take the job on the condition that she go out on a date with him after the fact. Rachel doesn’t care one way or the other and agrees to the condition.

Meanwhile, Captain America ambushes Anaconda and Puff Adder. He realizes that without the Super Soldier Serum in his body, he will need to take down the pair as quickly as possible before they can discover that he is not as powerful as he used to be.[6] Although Captain America gets the drop on the pair, they are soon joined by Rock Python who manages to overpower Cap and threatens to throw him off the side of Rachel’s building.

Simultaneously, Diamondback take Paladan to the Serpent Society’s new hideout at the Stuyvesant Arms Hotel. There she drugs the front desk clerk and breaks into the secret hideout. There they get the drop on Bushmaster and force him to take them to where Asp and Black Mamba are being held. He takes them down to the facility gym where the two women have been strung up. Rachel can’t tell if her friends are alive or dead. However, when she tries to get them loose, King Cobra leaps down from the rafters, prompting Bushmaster to lung at Diamondback. In the ensuing struggle, Rachel drops one of her diamonds filled with acid, horribly burning the inside of Bushmaster’s mouth. She is horrified by this because she was was going for one of her knock out gas diamonds and grabbed the wrong one in a panic. Not far away, Paladin continues to struggle with King Cobra. That’s when the Serpent Society leader shoots Rachel in the back with one of his venom darts. As Rachel collapses to the floor, King Cobra orders Paladin to surrender in exchange for getting Diamondback the antidote. Not wanting his client to die, Paladin surrenders without further incident.

Recurring Characters

Captain America, Diamondback, Serpent Society (King Cobra, Anaconda, Black Racer, Bushmaster, Coachwhip, Fer-De-Lance, Puff Adder, Rattler, Rock Python), Paladin, Sidewinder, Asp, Black Mamba, Bernie Rosenthal

Continuity Notes

  1. Rachel has been spied upon by the Serpent Society since Captain America #372. She was a founding member of the group in Captain America #310, but drifted away from the group in issue #344 due to a growing infatuation with Captain America and decided to go straight. She and Cap began officially dating in Captain America #371. She was kidnapped by the Serpent Society in Captain America #379 and put on trail last issue.

  2. Sidewinder was the former leader of the Serpent Society when it first formed in Captain America #310. He was later ousted by Viper in Captain America #342-344. When Viper was later defeated by Captain America, Sidewinder decided to quit and put Cobra in command. This will be chronicled in Captain America Annual #10.

  3. Bushmaster mistakingly calls King Cobra by his old name and is sharply corrected. The Cobra changed his name to better reflect his role as leader of the Serpent Society in Captain America #367.

  4. Steve Rogers’ relationship with Bernie Rosenthal grew to be quite serious. Steve and Bernie began dating shortly thereafter in issue #251. Bern figured out his double-identity in Captain America #275-276. Although Bernie proposed to him in issue #292, his duties as Captain America drove a wedge and Bernie ultimately decided to leave New York to pursue her legal career in issue #317. The two drifted apart shortly thereafter. Bernie returned to New York last issue.

  5. When Steve tells John to “wolf down” his burger, Jameson quips that he wishes Steve used a word other than “wolf”. This is a nod to the fact that John Jameson was once cursed by the Moon Gem to transform into the werewolf known as the Man-Wolf. This first happened in Amazing Spider-Man #124. However, at the time of this story John had long since been cured, as seen in Peter Parker the Spectacular Spider-Man Annual #3.

  6. Steve had to have it pumped out of system when it became tainted following a meth lab explosion. See Captain America #372-378. This doesn’t completely remove the serum from his body, which will begin replenishing itself in Captain America #384.

Ask Not What Your Country Can Do For You…

After learning that he was brainwashed by the military, John Walker — aka US Agent — demanded the truth from his government handlers.[1] Agreeing to restore his past memories, the military put John through a process to recover his lost memories.

He is made to remember the events leading to John joining the military. During this time he made friends with fellow soldiers Lemar Hoskins, Jerome Johnson, and Hector Lennox. After two uneventful years in the service, the four men left the military. Having one last night out together the men are discussing what they plan on doing next. It is here that they are approached by a representative of the Power Broker, who offers their strength enhancing program. The all agree to try it out and are brought to Los Angeles for the process. All of them are given enhanced strength and given resources to get work to best utilize their new powers.

They were then introduced to an agent named Ethan Thurm, who tried to convince them to join up with the Unlimited Class Wrestling Federation. However, John had grander ideas of using his powers to become a patriotic super-hero even greater than Captain America. With Thurm’s assistance John and his friends reinvented themselves as Super-Patriot and the Bold Urban Commandos. However, this only led to Super-Patriot speaking at live concerts on a rock tour of the country. Needing more, Super-Patriot arranged for a fight against Captain America himself. Impressively, Cap was able to hold his own against John, despite his enhanced strength. However, Super-Patriot cut the fight short because nobody was watching it. John eventually got the opportunity to upstage Captain America when he stopped a terrorist calling himself Warhead from detonating a nuclear bomb atop the Washington Monument. This got the attention of Valeria Cooper at the Commission of Superhuman Affairs who offered John the chance to become the new Captain Ameica.[2]

Recurring Characters

US Agent

Continuity Notes

  1. This is a bit of a long story that started when the government chose John Walker to become the new Captain America in issue #333. Walker didn’t pan out and Steve Rogers was given back the role in Captain America #350. However, the government still had a use for Walker and faked an assassination in issue #351. From there, John was brainwashed under the auspices of setting him up in his new identity of US Agent, as explained in Captain America #354. His former partner, Battlestar, tracked John down and got him to see the truth. See Captain America #372-378.

  2. John Walker and his buddies became Super-Patriot and the BUCKies in Captain America #323. He fought Captain America to a stand-still in issue #327. When the United States government decided to take back ownership of the Captain America identity from Steve Rogers, they offered it to John Walker after he stopped Warhead. See Captain America #332-333. John would assume the role of Captain America until issue #350.

Topical References

  • It is stated here that Bruce Springsteen was one of the acts at the rock tour that Super-Patriot was tied to. This should be considered a topical reference.

Captain America #380

Captain America #380

Captain America #382

Captain America #382